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2020.09.21 10:58 lets_eat_things New to this and struggling to make connections

So me and my partner have been together and mostly monogamous for 10 years. I say mostly as there has been some group sex situations we have been in.
A few months ago we decided to open up our relationship and it has been mostly good. However, recently I have been struggling. I am 29 F and have only been on a date with one person.
It was a fun time and they seemed really keen to meet up again as was I but then recently have been responding a bit less. We were meant to meet for the second time a few days ago but they cancelled due to being sick but also immediately offered an alternate maybe day (depending if they were well). But didn't end up reaching out on that day at all. Should I just be straight up and ask if they want to meet again and if not that's ok?
The whole not knowing is what is driving me a little bit crazy I think.
My partner has been doing pretty good and is meeting someone new today. The first person they met went really well. I am experiencing some jealousy from this but it is as expected We have spoken about this and I have journaled.
Sorry for rambling haha I need an impartial opinion I guess. I am very new to meeting people online and it's just difficult for me to open up. Then thinking this person was keen to meet up again and now they aren't responding as much is confusing.
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2020.09.21 10:53 LazElfje How can I slow things down without putting out the fire?

I firmly believe that the best kind of relationships are ones where you get to know one another as people first and form a foundation of respect, before romantic expectations kick in. I don’t do online dating for this reason, because it has a clear end goal. I usually meet people through shared hobbies or via mutual friends. Even so, I have noticed a pattern that I want to break.
When I meet someone I have initial interest in, I try to get to know them as a person first, however 9/10 they will start flirting with me within a week or two. Once that happens, getting to know each other goes out of the window and it becomes focused on superficial conversation and connection, flirting because it’s fun.
I don’t want to enter something with someone because they said things that are romantically exciting, because that’s temporary. I want to enter something with someone because I can see good compatibility, and for me, being able to have deep conversations is a big part of having a deep, and respectful, relationship.
TL;DR How can I keep that balance of getting to know someone without rushing the romantic side of things, whilst not making them feel rejected?
submitted by LazElfje to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2020.09.21 10:32 WhoAmIEven2 How much flirting do you actually do online, and is it okay to just do small talk?

I (M31] have been talking to this girl [F28] since last Monday or something, so a week ago. The reason we haven't met is that I have wanted to drag out on it, but because she is working the night shift at her job and just haven't had the time to set up a date, but we will finally make it happen on Tuesday when she's free and I'm also free Wednesday.
We write to each other more every day, and both she and I write long messages. She's definitely not the type who just type two word answers.
The problem, or rather the question, I have is, how much of this time should be spent actively flirting? As it is right now we mostly talk about each other's lives, and then whenever I find a good message to respond with something flirty I try to make a flirty suggestion. She does seem accepting of it, with lots of "Oh really? ;)", but I don't know if I come off as cringe. I have Aspergers, so it's difficult to read people and how they respond to it, especially through text.
One example is yesterday;
"Me: Buy her a toy with catnip, then I promise you you'll get lots of love from her ;)Her: I think you underestimate how independent she is ;)Me: Like mother, like cat? Are you gonna scratch me if you lose on Shuffleboard on tuesday? ;o if so, only so that it's not visible when I'm back to work come Thursday!Her: I'm quite harmless ;) so you don't need to worryMe: "quite", so not fully? I like that kind of mystery ;)Her: haha, is that so? ;)Me: Complete innocence is no fun :) "
Is this okay? She seems responsive to it, but I dunno.
Anyway, it's not like we do this all the time. That would get boring real quick, I think. I just try to put up some suggestive words here and there, is that how you are supposed to do it? When you talk to someone online, how much normal small talk/get to know her do you do in comparison to flirting?
She has said that she really likes that I can hold a conversation instead of just saying things like "What's up?", "ok" and other short messages.
submitted by WhoAmIEven2 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2020.09.21 09:04 WhoAmIEven2 How much flirting do you actually do online, and is it okay to just do small talk?

I (M31] have been talking to this girl [F28] since last Monday or something, so a week ago. The reason we haven't met is that I have wanted to drag out on it, but because she is working the night shift at her job and just haven't had the time to set up a date, but we will finally make it happen on Tuesday when she's free and I'm also free Wednesday.
We write to each other more every day, and both she and I write long messages. She's definitely not the type who just type two word answers.
The problem, or rather the question, I have is, how much of this time should be spent actively flirting?As it is right now we mostly talk about each other's lives, and then whenever I find a good message to respond with something flirty I try to make a flirty suggestion. She does seem accepting of it, with lots of "Oh really? ;)", but I don't know if I come off as cringe. I have Aspergers, so it's difficult to read people and how they respond to it, especially through text.
One example is yesterday;"Me: Buy her a toy with catnip, then I promise you you'll get lots of love from her ;)Her: I think you underestimate how independent she is ;)Me: Like mother, like cat? Are you gonna scratch me if you lose on Shuffleboard on tuesday? ;o if so, only so that it's not visible when I'm back to work come Thursday!Her: I'm quite harmless ;) so you don't need to worryMe: "quite", so not fully? I like that kind of mystery ;)Her: haha, is that so? ;)Me: Complete innocence is no fun :) "
Is this okay? She seems responsive to it, but I dunno.
Anyway, it's not like we do this all the time. That would get boring real quick, I think. I just try to put up some suggestive words here and there, is that how you are supposed to do it?When you talk to someone online, how much normal small talk/get to know her do you do in comparison to flirting?
She has said that she really likes that I can hold a conversation instead of just saying things like "What's up?", "ok" and other short messages.
submitted by WhoAmIEven2 to dating_advice [link] [comments]


2020.09.21 08:44 ScienceReliance Anyone else having a confusing mixture of a very easy, and very hard time with distancing and quarantine?

I was sheltered my whole life, not allowed friends, only around my mother, brother off and on, occasionally my sister (all awful people and the source of my trauma) and the people that tended to gravitate to my mom who was easily manipulated and used. pulled out of school by 3rd grade, spent less than a year in for the rest of my life. homeless for a lot of the time so doing things was never in the cards for me. I felt so spoiled going on bi-weekly dinner dates with my fiance to a fancy ramen shop.
All my hobbies are alone, gaming, writing, reading, art etc. I never got used to going out or having fun because it was so rare growing up so being in my own space alone is my natural state.
But as it has worn on and April turned into September i realized i've just wasted ANOTHER year of my life, days drifting by hazilly, blending together into nothing. And i feel so crushed by it. The week covid shut down my job I was going to get a reptile educators license, go to schools and reptile shows to educate, volunteer for field studies etc. All of it out the window. I can't get another job because nowhere would take me that I would be remotely safe from the virus (my mom tried to force me to follow her career as a cook, so cooking, and retail are my only work skills) I just started living my life 6 years ago, and last year i had a horrible health scare so most of it was a bust, and due to how sick i was then i'm terrified now to my core of getting the virus. I'm not in the risk group... but the risk isn't 0 and my years in squalled conditions probably didn't help my health.
I leave the house maybe once a week usually to get groceries or go to the dump and that's it most weeks, a lot of the time I order the food online and just have it taken to the car, as afraid as I am i really want to help reduce the risk to everyone too. When i feel brave i'll go to the pet store with my snake. a few weeks ago i stopped to tell a family about him and reptiles, they were really interested, but most of the time when i was holding him for them to see my hands were shaking like a leaf because my social anxiety came back while secluded and hasn't been this bad since i left home, i thought i was past it. My driving anxiety has returned horribly too, I've only driven now for a year or two (learned at 27) and now i feel so hopelessly sick and anxious when i drive 5 minutes to the store, and overthink things like "what if there's a car here at this turn coming up? no i'll just drive past this turn, and turn around at the parking lot ahead with the stop light so i don't screw it up"
My sleep schedule is worse than it's been in a long time, before i'd usually go to bed at 3 or something. but now who knows when i actually fall asleep?
Every fiber of my being was ready to go into my career field and now i feel like i'm turning back into the helpless ball of uselessness i was. for a few bright years i was a badass, i broke out, i was friendly, social, helpful, brave, i'd jump in between fights and invite people to hang out, i would trust and i was trusted. People relied on me and in the town of 2100 i was so good at my work i literally had people come to me while working to try and get me to work for them. and i feel like that girl is dying.
So the minute to minute is fine, filling my time with meaningless hobbies, getting the needed chores done. but then i remember i am approaching 30 and am no closer to my dream career than i was when I was 12.
My fiance started college and has it half done since the virus started, and he's still working. his sister has a baby and is doing the rotations to be a doctor. their brother is a business major and took a road trip to see friends during break and is now back getting ready for the extra year for his masters or something. I dropped out after failing 2 of my 3 classes because that health issue started and i can't do math past probability, statistics, geometry etc. all of which i'm great at. but i spent 6 months trying to learn a single trig equation and i couldn't remember it.
i'm just here, existing. And i hate it. And for the first time in a long time, i hate myself.
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2020.09.21 08:39 CleanSocks28 Does anyone else find themselves losing interest in potential dates after a few days? I can't tell if it's a lack of common interests or if I'm expecting too much and need a reality check.

I've had a handful of dates recently that have went well in person but haven't really developed into anything.
It's the strangest thing, I've been attracted to them physically, respect their ambitions and careers and have even had sex with a few. Aside from surface level connections there's never been any fun or desire pulling me to pursue anything more with these people.
More often than not it feels like I'm doing most of the work to plan and set up the dates and then steer the conversations as well. It almost feels like work rather than something fun to look forward to.
I'll try and find common ground or take an interest in their own hobbies while trying to share my own but it just seems like work or some sort of business meeting rather than a fun conversion.
They've all been great people, attractive well read and with their lives together but for some unexplainable reason I lose interest with them.
I'm not expecting to be best friends out the gate but I guess early days of dating feel more like work to me rather than something fun that I'm looking forward to.
Anyone have any idea what could be wrong with me? Maybe I'm burning out in dating as a whole? I feel like a lack of common interests could have something to do with it but it's hard to figure out someone's hobbies through their profiles (most are empty)
Dating should be fun so I feel like I might need a break?
Also just an aside but... Has anyone else noticed that Fall seems to be the "busy season" for online dating? I've never gotten this many matches any other time of the year. It is bizarre.
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2020.09.21 06:04 MrBKainXTR LoK Rewatch Season 4 Episode 1: "After All These Years"

Book Four Balance: Chapter One
Previous: S3E12/13; Book Three Discussion Hub Next
Spoilers: For the sake of those that haven't watched the full series yet, please use the spoiler tag to hide spoilers for majospecific plot points that occur in episodes after the one being discussed.
Discord: Discuss on our server as well.
Fun Facts/Trivia:
-New VAs/Characters: Sunil Malhotra (Prince Wu), Todd Haberkorn (Baatar Jr.)
-The hotel, Republic City Four Elements, name is similar to the Canadian hotel chain Four Seasons, while the building itself resembles the Plaza Hotel in New York City.
-The logo on the floor during Korra's cage fight is the same one as that of Earth Rumble in ATLA.
Overview:
In the three years since the insurrection of the Red Lotus, Republic City has adapted to the spirits living in the metropolis, accepting them as a part of the city. Asami Sato's Future Industries has modernized Central City Station, and the great-nephew of the late Hou-Ting, Prince Wu, is being groomed to hold the still-vacant throne of the Earth Kingdom, with Mako serving as his bodyguard. Kuvira and Baatar Jr., along with their supporters, have traveled the Earth Kingdom in an attempt to reunite it under her militaristic rule. Kai and Opal stop a robbery in the State of Yi, but they are unable to restore the town's supply lines, leaving the reluctant governor no choice but to agree to Kuvira's terms, and he signs over the control of the state to her. Korra, who was set to reunite with Team Avatar in Republic City, has instead been traveling alone for the past six months, hiding her identity as the Avatar.

This episode was directed by Colin Heck and written by Joshua Hamilton.
Air Date: October 3, 2014 (Online), November 28, 2014 (Nicktoons)
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2020.09.21 03:46 lablife110 Second date he took me to a sex shop!

Hey everyone! So I met this guy online and we instantly connected. We chatted all day and well into the the night from the moment we connected online. It felt like we’ve known each other forever. We met in person on day 4. Instant connection once we laid eyes on each other. We had a great dinner, then went for a cocktail and then afterwards we headed back to his place to watch a movie. Let’s just say I don’t even remember what movie he had put on as we started making out almost immediately. It had been quite a while since either of us had had sex and I was super nervous to go that far. However, it just felt right and things progressed. We ended up going upstairs to his bedroom and had mind blowing sex! Like 3 times! Was incredible! The next day he picked me up and we went to lunch then did some shopping. It was a holiday weekend and there wasn’t much open. We were at the light and both noticed a sex shop on our right was open. We looked at each other laughing and decided it would be fun to go in and check it out. One of the things that stood out to us was the bondage section, specifically the paddles. The night before, we enjoyed some spanking and hair pulling so we decided to go ahead and buy one! Yes, this is on our second date lol We headed back to his place and see what the paddle was all about. Again, we had amazing sex and decided to keep the paddle lol We then went to dinner, had a few beers and then again back to his house for some more passionate, ass spanking sex before driving me home. The next day I had to work but he picked me up afterwards and we went to dinner. Then of course, back to his place for some great sex! That was our first weekend together!
He went out of town until Friday night but we still continued to text and talk every single night for hours and hours. He came over Saturday and we hung out for a few hours at my place. We were laying in my bed and he told me he loved me for the first time. I said it back without any hesitation. It just felt right, it still feels right. We’re in love! If you’re following closely, this is only day 10. Sunday, he came over again and watched football with my 18 year old son.
Weekend 3. Day 16. He got back into town and we made plans for dinner. He picked me up, we went out then naturally went back to his place to do what we do best! Today we decided to add one more element to our sexy time and that was him filming himself with his phone spanking me during sex. Then we watched it together afterwards! Was super hot and got us both turned on again.
I’ve never in my life have ever experienced anything like this. The intimacy, the connection, the fact that I enjoy being spanked, any of it! Even the amount of love that I feel. I truly feel like we do love each other but is it too soon? Are we crazy in love or just crazy?
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2020.09.21 03:12 Lavender_Margarita A Soul Has No Age

"Puma", "Cougar", "Mrs. Robinson", "Cradle-snatcher", and "MILF", are just some of the names used for a woman who is dating a man 10 years or more younger than them. Though the meaning can change for these words depending on how they were used, it still boils down to one objective: To label a woman dating a younger man negatively. Sadly, though it is unfair, that is how society views these May-December relationships.
My boyfriend is 20 years younger than me (He is an adult, before anyone freaks out). If you would do the math, by the time he was born I will be celebrating my 21st birthday the following month. Though at 21 I would still consider myself too young to have a child, but biologicallly I could have a baby at that age. Now most of you would probably gasp at what I just said and give me the disgusted look or label me, but I am neither of those. Puzzled? Confused? Why not, you ask? Let me tell you why.
I met him on an app used for "Roleplaying". I downloaded it basically because I love writing short stories and thought that it would be fun to create characters and write a story with other people as roleplays work that way. That being said, I joined groups and got invited into some. What I love about being in this vitual environment is you can be anyone you want to be. Everyone is not required to reveal their age, gender, race, ethnicity, etc. You can leave your sad reality behind.
He messaged me. Not knowing how the other one looks like in real life, not knowing each other's age, not revealing our real names to each other, we started chatting and became really good friends online. We have a lot of similarities and would chat for hours about everything, and go even nerdy about the things we know. It went on like that for us everyday, and from there, we started to reveal truths about each other slowly. I do know at the back of my head that he might be way younger than me and my hunch was right when he revealed his age but mine remained a secret. A lot of people do not reveal their age in there anyway, so I can choose not to and be mysterious.
Before I knew it, he was already asking me to date him. At first I thought it was just an online thing so I agreed despite the age gap. I thought it's just one of those online couple thing where feelings in real life are not involved. Though I know that I am starting to like him for real, I would always tell myself that I am just fond of him that is all and if that is just how he sees this online relationship is, I am content with that and no strings attached.
Months passed and things are getting serious. I am really in love with him now and he is too. I felt guilty and hated myself for not proactively telling him something that he should know. Perhaps I felt like there was no need for it since all that matters is how we feel for each other and I was scared too of what could happen to our relationship if I say it so I never dared to but I know that he should know. I gathered up the all my courage one day to tell him my real age. To which he replied "Does that change anything? Knowing that doesn't change the fact the I love you for who you are."
I was ready to accept that he would judge and ridicule me the moment he learns that we have two decades of age gap. I was ready to accept that he would break up with me but his response brought me to tears. Doubtful that he might be just too young to understand the cons of having a relationship with me, I asked him all the what ifs inside my head and everytime I would only get one consistent answer from him: "I do not care about other people, what they think, what they would say, nor how they feel about it. All I care about is you, no one else. All I need is you in my life. You are all I ever wanted, you are my dream come true."
A year since we started dating, we are still miles apart. We spend hours online, either on a video or voice call, and chatting everyday without fail. Do we have plans of meeting each other? Yes we do and hey, he even asked me to marry him. We are both getting ready to be with each other so we need to bear with the fact that we are apart for now since it would be a big leap for both of us since we live on the opposite sides of the world. Being in a long distance relationship taught us to appreciate small things that other couples take for granted. We learned how a simple touch and hug can be so amazing and magical and couldn't wait for the day when we could even just hold each other's hand.
Our love is neither physical nor carnal. Our love is ageless, pure, and true. I may be physically older but I am just a woman who finally met her soulmate, the one who is truly destined to be with her. He may be physically younger but he has more maturity than men I have met twice his age. He knows what he wants. He is driven and responsible. No one has ever looked at me with so much love and treated me with so much importance and I have never loved anyone this way before. He is my world and I am his and yes, I am just another woman in love.
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2020.09.21 02:47 Leather_Term Meet Brock Pierce, the Presidential Candidate With Ties to Pedophiles Who Wants to End Human Trafficking

thedailybeast.com Sep. 20, 2020.
The “Mighty Ducks” actor is running for president. He clears the air (sort of) to Tarpley Hitt about his ties to Jeffrey Epstein and more.
In the trailer for First Kid, the forgettable 1996 comedy about a Secret Service agent assigned to protect the president’s son, the title character, played by a teenage Brock Pierce, describes himself as “definitely the most powerful kid in the universe.” Now, the former child star is running to be the most powerful man in the world, as an Independent candidate for President of the United States.
Before First Kid, the Minnesota-born actor secured roles in a series of PG-rated comedies, playing a young Emilio Estevez in The Mighty Ducks, before graduating to smaller parts in movies like Problem Child 3: Junior in Love. When his screen time shrunk, Pierce retired from acting for a real executive role: co-founding the video production start-up Digital Entertainment Network (DEN) alongside businessman Marc Collins-Rector. At age 17, Pierce served as its vice president, taking in a base salary of $250,000.
DEN became “the poster child for dot-com excesses,” raising more than $60 million in seed investments and plotting a $75 million IPO. But it turned into a shorthand for something else when, in October of 1999, the three co-founders suddenly resigned. That month, a New Jersey man filed a lawsuit alleging Collins-Rector had molested him for three years beginning when he was 13 years old. The following summer, three teens filed a sexual-abuse lawsuit against Pierce, Collins-Rector, and their third co-founder, Chad Shackley. The plaintiffs later dropped their case against Pierce (he made a payment of $21,600 to one of their lawyers) and Shackley. But after a federal grand jury indicted Collins-Rector on criminal charges in 2000, the DEN founders left the country. When Interpol arrested them in 2002, they said they had confiscated “guns, machetes, and child pornography” from the trio’s beach villa in Spain.
While abroad, Pierce had pivoted to a new venture: Internet Gaming Entertainment, which sold virtual accessories in multiplayer online role-playing games to those desperate to pay, as one Wired reporter put it, “as much as $1,800 for an eight-piece suit of Skyshatter chain mail” rather than earn it in the games themselves. In 2005, a 25-year-old Pierce hired then-Goldman Sachs banker Steve Bannon—just before he would co-found Breitbart News. Two years later, after a World of Warcraft player sued the company for “diminishing” the fun of the game, Steve Bannon replaced Pierce as CEO.
Collins-Rector eventually pleaded guilty to eight charges of child enticement and registered as a sex offender. In the years that followed, Pierce waded into the gonzo economy of cryptocurrencies, where he overlapped more than once with Jeffrey Epstein, and counseled him on crypto. In that world, he founded Tether, a cryptocurrency that bills itself as a “stablecoin,” because its value is allegedly tied to the U.S. dollar, and the blockchain software company Block.one. Like his earlier businesses, Pierce’s crypto projects see-sawed between massive investments and curious deals. When Block.one announced a smart contract software called EOS.IO, the company raised $4 billion almost overnight, setting an all-time record before the product even launched. The Securities and Exchange Commission later fined the company $24 million for violating federal securities law. After John Oliver mocked the ordeal, calling Pierce a “sleepy, creepy cowboy,” Block.one fired him. Tether, meanwhile, is currently under investigation by the New York Attorney General for possible fraud.
On July 4, Pierce announced his candidacy for president. His campaign surrogates include a former Cambridge Analytica director and the singer Akon, who recently doubled down on developing an anonymously funded, $6 billion “Wakanda-like” metropolis in Senegal called Akon City. Pierce claims to be bipartisan, and from the 11 paragraphs on the “Policy” section of his website it can be hard to determine where he falls on the political spectrum. He supports legalizing marijuana and abolishing private prisons, but avoids the phrase “climate change.” He wants to end “human trafficking.” His proposal to end police brutality: body cams.
His political contributions tell a more one-sided story. Pierce’s sole Democratic contribution went to the short-lived congressional run of crypto candidate Brian Forde. The rest went to Republican campaigns like Marco Rubio, Rick Perry, John McCain, and the National Right to Life Political Action Committee. Last year alone, Pierce gave over $44,000 to the Republican National Committee and more than $55,000 to Trump’s re-election fund.
Pierce spoke to The Daily Beast from his tour bus and again over email. Those conversations have been combined and edited for clarity.
You’re announcing your presidential candidacy somewhat late, and historically, third-party candidates haven’t had the best luck with the executive office. If you don’t have a strong path to the White House, what do you want out of the race?
I announced on July 4, which I think is quite an auspicious date for an Independent candidate, hoping to bring independence to this country. There’s a lot of things that I can do. One is: I’m 39 years old. I turn 40 in November. So I’ve got time on my side. Whatever happens in this election cycle, I’m laying the groundwork for the future. The overall mission is to create a third major party—not another third party—a third major party in this country. I think that is what America needs most. George Washington in his closing address warned us about the threat of political parties. John Adams and the other founding fathers—their fear for our future was two political parties becoming dominant. And look at where we are. We were warned.
I believe, having studied systems, any time you have a system of two, what happens is those two things come together, like magnets. They come into collision, or they become polarized and become completely divided. I think we need to rise above partisan politics and find a path forward together. As Albert Einstein is quoted—I’m not sure the line came from him, but he’s quoted in many places—he said that the definition of insanity is making the same mistake or doing the same thing over and over and over again, expecting a different result. [Ed. note: Einstein never said this.] It feels like that’s what our election cycle is like. Half the country feels like they won, half the country feels like they lost, at least if they voted or participated.
Obviously, there’s another late-comer to the presidential race, and that’s Kanye West. He’s received a lot of flak for his candidacy, as he’s openly admitted to trying to siphon votes away from Joe Biden to ensure a Trump victory. Is that something you’re hoping to avoid or is that what you’re going for as well?
Oh no. This is a very serious campaign. Our campaign is very serious. You’ll notice I don’t say anything negative about either of the two major political candidates, because I think that’s one of the problems with our political system, instead of people getting on stage, talking about their visionary ideas, inspiring people, informing and educating, talking about problems, mentioning problems, talking about solutions, constructive criticism. That’s why I refuse to run a negative campaign. I am definitely not a spoiler. I’m into data, right? I’m a technologist. I’ve got digital DNA. So does most of our campaign team. We’ve got our finger on the pulse.
Most of my major Democratic contacts are really happy to see that we’re running in a red state like Wyoming. Kanye West’s home state is Wyoming. He’s not on the ballot in Wyoming I could say, in part, because he didn’t have Akon on his team. But I could also say that he probably didn’t want to be on the ballot in Wyoming because it’s a red state. He doesn’t want to take additional points in a state where he’s only running against Trump. But we’re on the ballot in Wyoming, and since we’re on the ballot in Wyoming I think it’s safe—more than safe, I think it’s evident—that we are not here to run as a spoiler for the benefit of Donald Trump.
In running for president, you’ve opened yourself up to be scrutinized from every angle going back to the beginning of your career. I wanted to ask you about your time at the Digital Entertainment Network. Can you tell me a little bit about how you started there? You became a vice president as a teenager. What were your qualifications and what was your job exactly?
Well, I was the co-founder. A lot of it was my idea. I had an idea that people would use the internet to watch videos, and we create content for the internet. The idea was basically YouTube and Hulu and Netflix. Anyone that was around in the ‘90s and has been around digital media since then, they all credit us as the creators of basically those ideas. I was just getting a message from the creator of The Vandals, the punk rock band, right before you called. He’s like, “Brock, looks like we’re going to get the Guinness Book of World Records for having created the first streaming television show.”
We did a lot of that stuff. We had 30 television shows. We had the top most prestigious institutions in the world as investors. The biggest names. High-net-worth investors like Terry Semel, who’s chairman and CEO of Warner Brothers, and became the CEO of Yahoo. I did all sorts of things. I helped sell $150,000 worth of advertising contracts to the CEOs of Pepsi and everything else. I was the face of the company, meeting all the major banks and everything else, selling the vision of what the future was.
You moved in with Marc Collins-Rector and Chad Shackley at a mansion in Encino. Was that the headquarters of the business?
All start-ups, they normally start out in your home. Because it’s just you. The company was first started out of Marc’s house, and it was probably there for the first two or three months, before the company got an office. That’s, like, how it is for all start-ups.
were later a co-defendant in the L.A. County case filed against Marc Collins-Rector for plying minors with alcohol and drugs, in order to facilitate sexual abuse. You were dropped from the case, but you settled with one of the men for $21,600. Can you explain that?
Okay, well, first of all, that’s not accurate. Two of the plaintiffs in that case asked me if I would be a plaintiff. Because I refused to be a part of the lawsuit, they chose to include me to discredit me, to make their case stronger. They also went and offered 50 percent of what they got to the house management—they went around and offered money to anyone to participate in this. They needed people to corroborate their story. Eventually, because I refused to participate in the lawsuit, they named me. Subsequently, all three of the plaintiffs apologized to me, in front of audiences, in front of many people, saying Brock never did anything. They dismissed their cases.
Remember, this is a civil thing. I’ve never been charged with a crime in my life. And the last plaintiff to have his case dismissed, he contacted his lawyer and said, “Dismiss this case against Brock. Brock never did anything. I just apologized. Dismiss his case.” And the lawyer said, “No. I won’t dismiss this case, I have all these out-of-pocket expenses, I refuse to file the paperwork unless you give me my out-of-pocket expenses.” And so the lawyer, I guess, had $21,000 in bills. So I paid his lawyer $21,000—not him, it was not a settlement. That was a payment to his lawyer for his out-of-pocket expenses. Out-of-pocket expenses so that he would file the paperwork to dismiss the case.
You’ve said the cases were unfounded, and the plaintiffs eventually apologized. But your boss, Marc Collins-Rector later pleaded guilty to eight charges of child enticement and registered as a sex offender. Were you aware of his behavior? How do you square the fact that later allegations proved to be true, but these ones were not?
Well, remember: I was 16 and 17 years old at the time? So, no. I don’t think Marc is the man they made him out to be. But Marc is not a person I would associate with today, and someone I haven’t associated with in a very long time. I was 16 and 17. I chose the wrong business partner. You live and you learn.
You’ve pointed out that you were underage when most of these allegations were said to take place. Did you ever feel like you were coerced or in over your head while working at DEN?
I mean, I was working 18 hours a day, doing things I’d never done before. It was business school. But I definitely learned a lot in building that company. We raised $88 million. We filed our [form] S-1 to go public. We were the hottest start-up in Los Angeles.
In 2000, you left the country with Marc Collins-Rector. Why did you leave? How did you spend those two years abroad?
I moved to Spain in 1999 for personal reasons. I spent those two years in Europe working on developing my businesses.
Interpol found you in 2002. The house where you were staying reportedly contained guns, machetes, and child pornography. Whose guns and child porn were those? Were you aware they were in the house, and how did those get there?
My lawyers have addressed this in 32 pages of documentation showing a complete absence of wrongdoing. Please refer to my webpage for more information.
[Ed. Note: The webpage does not mention guns, machetes, or child pornography. It does state:“It is true that when the local police arrested Collins-Rector in Spain in 2002 on an international warrant, Mr. Pierce was also taken into custody, but so was everyone at Collins-Rector’s house in Spain; and it is equally clear that Brock was promptly released, and no charges of any kind were ever filed against Brock concerning this matter.”]
What do you make of the allegations against Bryan Singer? [Ed. Note: Bryan Singer, a close friend of Collins-Rector, invested at least $50,000 in DEN. In an Atlantic article outlining Singer’s history of alleged sexual assault and statutory rape, one source claimed that at age 15, Collins-Rector abused him and introduced him to Singer, who then assaulted him in the DEN headquarters.]
I am aware of them and I support of all victims of sexual assault. I will let America’s justice system decide on Singer’s outcome.
In 2011, you spoke at the Mindshift conference supported by Jeffrey Epstein. At that point, he had already been convicted of soliciting prostitution from a minor. Why did you agree to speak?
I had never heard of Jeffrey Epstein. His name was not on the website. I was asked to speak at a conference alongside Nobel Prize winners. It was not a cryptocurrency conference, it was filled with Nobel Prize winners. I was asked to speak alongside Nobel Prize winners on the future of money. I speak at conferences historically, two to three times a week. I was like, “Nobel Prize winners? Sounds great. I’ll happily talk about the future of money with them.” I had no idea who Jeffrey Epstein was. His name was not listed anywhere on the website. Had I known what I know now? I clearly would have never spoken there. But I spoke at a conference that he cosponsored.
What’s your connection to the Clinton Global Initiative? Did you hear about it through Jeffrey Epstein?
I joined the Clinton Global Initiative as a philanthropist in 2006 and was a member for one year. My involvement with the Initiative had no connection to Jeffrey Epstein whatsoever.
You’ve launched your campaign in Minnesota, where George Floyd was killed by a police officer. How do you feel about the civil uprising against police brutality?
I’m from Minnesota. Born and raised. We just had a press conference there, announcing that we’re on the ballot. Former U.S. Senator Dean Barkley was there. So that tells you, when former U.S. Senators are endorsing the candidate, right?
[Ed. note: Barkley was never elected to the United States Senate. In November of 2002, he was appointed by then Minnesota Governor Jesse Venture to fill the seat after Sen. Paul Wellstone died in a plane crash. Barkley’s term ended on Jan. 3, 2003—two months later.]
Yes, George Floyd was murdered in Minneapolis. My vice-presidential running mate Karla Ballard and I, on our last trip to Minnesota together, went to visit the George Floyd Memorial. I believe in law and order. I believe that law and order is foundational to any functioning society. But there is no doubt in my mind that we need reform. These types of events—this is not an isolated incident. This has happened many times before. It’s time for change. We have a lot of detail around policy on this issue that we will be publishing next week. Not just high-level what we think, not just a summary, but detailed policy.
You said that you support “law and order.” What does that mean?
“Law and order” means creating a fair and just legal system where our number one priority is protecting the inalienable rights of “Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness” for all people. This means reforming how our police intervene in emergency situations, abolishing private prisons that incentivize mass incarceration, and creating new educational and economic opportunities for our most vulnerable communities. I am dedicated to preventing crime by eliminating the socioeconomic conditions that encourage it.
I support accountability and transparency in government and law enforcement. Some of the key policies I support are requiring body-cams on all law enforcement officers who engage with the public, curtailing the 1033 program that provides local law enforcement agencies with access to military equipment, and abolishing private prisons. Rather than simply defund the police, my administration will take a holistic approach to heal and unite America by ending mass incarceration, police brutality, and racial injustice.
Did you attend any Black Lives Matter protests?
I support all movements aimed at ending racial injustice and inequality. I​ have not attended any Black Lives Matter protests.​ My running-mate, Karla Ballard, attended the March on Washington in support of racial justice and equality.
Your platform doesn’t mention the words “climate change.” Is there a reason for that?
I’m not sure what you mean. Our policy platform specifically references human-caused climate change and we have a plan to restabilize the climate, address environmental degradation, and ensure environmental sustainability.
[Ed. Note: As of writing the Pierce campaign’s policy platform does not specifically reference human-caused climate change.]
You’ve recently brought on Akon as a campaign surrogate. How did that happen? Tell me about that.
Akon and I have been friends for quite some time. I was one of the guys that taught him about Bitcoin. I helped make some videogames for him, I think in 2012. We were talking about Bitcoin, teaching him the ropes, back in 2013. And in 2014, we were both speaking at the Milken Global Conference, and I encouraged him to talk about how Bitcoin, Africa, changed the world. He became the biggest celebrity in the world, talking about Bitcoin at the time. I’m an adviser to his Akoin project, very interested in the work that he’s doing to build a city in Africa.
I think we need a government that’s of, for, and by the people. Akon has huge political aspirations. He obviously was a hugely successful artist. But he also discovered artists like Lady Gaga. So not only is he, himself, a great artist, but he’s also a great identifier and builder of other artists. And he’s been a great businessman, philanthropist. He’s pushing the limits of what can be done. We’re like-minded individuals in that regard. I think he’ll be running for political office one day, because he sees what I see: that we need real change, and we need a government that is of, for, and by the people.
You mentioned that you’re an adviser on Akoin. Do you have any financial investments in Akoin or Akon City?
I don’t believe so. I’d have to check. I have so much stuff. But I don’t believe that I have any economic interests in his stuff. I’d have to verify that. We’ll get back to you. I don’t believe that I have any economic interests. My interest is in helping him. He’s a visionary with big ideas that wants to help things in the world. If I can be of assistance in helping him make the world a better place, I’m all for it. I’m not motivated by money. I’m not running for office because I’m motivated by power. I’m running for office because I’m deeply, deeply concerned about our collective future.
You’ve said you’re running on a pro-technology platform. One week into your campaign last month, a New York appeals court approved the state Attorney General’s attempt to investigate the stablecoin Tether for potentially fraudulent activity. Do you think this will impact your ability to sell people on your tech entrepreneurship?
No, I think my role in Tether is as awesome as it gets. It was my idea. I put it together. But I’ve had no involvement in the company since 2015. I gave all of my equity to the other shareholders. I’ve had zero involvement in the company for almost six years. It was just my idea. I put the initial team together. But I think Tether is one of the most important innovations in the world, certainly. The idea is, I digitized the U.S. dollar. I used technology to digitize currency—existing currency. The U.S. dollar in particular. It’s doing $10 trillion a year. Ten trillion dollars a year of transactional volume. It’s probably the most important innovation in currency since the advent of fiat money. The people that took on the business and ran the business in years to come, they’ve done things I’m not proud of. I’m not sure they’ve done anything criminal. But they certainly did things differently than I would do. But it’s like, you have kids, they turn 18, they go out into the world, and sometimes you’re proud of the things they do, and sometimes you shake your head and go, “Ugh, why did you do that?” I have zero concerns as it relates to me personally. I wish they made better decisions.
What do you think the investigation will find?
I have no idea. The problem that was raised is that there was a $5 million loan between two entities and whether or not they had the right to do that, did they disclose it correctly. There’s been no accusations of, like, embezzlement or anything that bad.
[Ed. Note: The Attorney General’s press release on the investigation reads: “Our investigation has determined that the operators of the ‘Bitfinex’ trading platform, who also control the ‘tether’ virtual currency, have engaged in a cover-up to hide the apparent loss of $850 million dollars of co-mingled client and corporate funds.”]
But there’s been some disclosure things, that is the issue. No one is making any outrageous claims that these are people that have done a bunch of bad—well, on the internet, the media has said that the people behind the business may have been manipulating the price of Bitcoin, but I don’t think that has anything to do with the New York investigation. Again, I’m so not involved, and so not at risk, that I’m not even up to speed on the details.
[Ed note: A representative of the New York State Attorney General told Forbes that he “cannot confirm or deny that the investigation” includes Pierce.]
We’ve recently witnessed the rise of QAnon, the conspiracy theory that Hollywood is an evil cabal of Satanic pedophiles and Trump is the person waging war on them. You mentioned human trafficking, which has become a cause for them. What are your thoughts on that?
I’ve watched some of the content. I think it’s an interesting phenomenon. I’m an internet person, so Anonymous is obviously an organization that has been doing interesting stuff. It’s interesting. I don’t have a big—conspiracy theory stuff is—I guess I have a question for you: What do you think of all of it, since you’re the expert?
You know, I think it’s not true, but I’m not running for president. I do wonder what this politician [Georgia congressional candidate Marjorie Taylor Greene], who’s just won her primary, is going to do on day one, once she finds out there’s no satanic cabal room.
Wait, someone was running for office and won on a QAnon platform, saying that Hollywood did—say what? You’re the expert here.
She won a primary. But I want to push on if we only have a few minutes. In 2006, your gaming company IGE brought on Steve Bannon as an investor. Goldman later bought out most of your stock. Bannon eventually replaced you as CEO of Affinity. You’ve described him as your “right-hand man for, like, seven years.” How well did you know Bannon during that time?
Yes, so this is in my mid-twenties. He wasn’t an investor. He worked for me. He was my banker. He worked for me for three years as my yield guide. And then he was my CEO running the company for another four years. So I haven’t worked with Steve for a decade or so. We worked in videogame stuff and banking. He was at Goldman Sachs. He was not in the political area at the time. But he was a pretty successful banker. He set up Goldman Sachs Los Angeles. So for me, I’d say he did a pretty good job.
During your business relationship, Steve Bannon founded Breitbart News, which has pretty consistently published racist material. How do you feel about Breitbart?
I had no involvement with Breitbart News. As for how I feel about such material, I’m not pleased by any form of hate-mongering. I strongly support the equality of all Americans.
Did you have qualms about Bannon’s role in the 2016 election?
Bannon’s role in the Trump campaign got me to pay closer attention to what he was doing but that’s about it. Whenever you find out that one of your former employees has taken on a role like that, you pay attention.
Bannon served on the board of Cambridge Analytica. A staffer on your campaign, Brittany Kaiser, also served as a business director for them. What are your thoughts on their use of illicitly-obtained Facebook data for campaign promotional material?
Yes, so this will be the last question I can answer because I’ve got to be off for this 5:00 pm. But Brittany Kaiser is a friend of mine. She was the whistleblower of Cambridge Analytica. She came to me and said, “What do I do?” And I said, “Tell the truth. The truth will set you free.”
[Ed. Note: Investigations in Cambridge Analytica took place as early as Nov. 2017, when a U.K. reporter at Channel 4 News recorded their CEO boasting about using “beautiful Ukranian girls” and offers of bribes to discredit political officials. The first whistleblower was Christopher Wylie, who disclosed a cache of documents to The Guardian, published on Mar. 17, 2018. Kaiser’s confession ran five days later, after the scandal made national news. Her association with Cambridge Analytica is not mentioned anywhere on Pierce’s campaign website.]
So I’m glad that people—I’m a supporter of whistleblowers, people that see injustice in the world and something not right happening, and who put themselves in harm’s way to stand up for what they believe in. So I stand up for Brittany Kaiser.
Who do you think [anonymous inventor of Bitcoin] Satoshi Nakamoto is?
We all are Satoshi Nakamoto.
You got married at Burning Man. Have you been attending virtual Burning Man?
I’m running a presidential campaign. So, while I was there in spirit, unfortunately my schedule did not permit me to attend.
OP note: please refer to the original article for reference links within text (as I've not added them here!)
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2020.09.21 01:38 paperplatess 25 [M4F] Southern California - Liberal leaning, homebody, gamer, law enforcement officers exist. Like myself.

This year has been a bit crazy for all of us I’m sure. I think I’m fortunate enough to have a job but it’s been an interesting time to say the least at work.
I’m hoping to find someone has has similar interests or just people that I click with. It’s been somewhat difficult at the moment. Even with all the dating apps we got nowadays.
I was born and raised in San Diego and currently work in the area in law enforcement. After college I decided this would be something I never thought I’d do but found myself enjoying. Mainly for the life experiences and the opportunity to grow and mature. Anyways enough about that for now. My real interests involve me being at home watching a good movie or playing games with someone with similar interests. I hate that playing games has such a stigma for adults. I believe it’s a great outlet to de stress and have fun. Im never done anything like this before so I’m just going to go ahead and list some facts about myself as well as some negative qualities I believe I have.
submitted by paperplatess to r4r [link] [comments]


2020.09.21 00:52 500scnds [Table] I made a free alternative to Photoshop, that is used by 7 million people. Ask me Anything!

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I understand that people are always hesitant to answer this very specifically, but I'm always curious - given 7 million visitors, what your ballpark profit? And what's the ratio of the profit-to-expenses, which I assume is mostly server hosting costs as a one man operation? Most of my profit comes from ads. I make around 5 cents for every hour someone spends in Photopea (on average). In 2019, people spent 5 million hours working in Photopea, so I made around $250,000. I hope it could be 2x to 4x more this year :)
Photopea runs completely in your computer (after Photopea.com loads, you can disconnect from the internet and use it offline). I use only a file hosting, for which I pay around 50 USD a year.
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How is that possible to only pay 50 USD/year when you get ~7 million people in a month and your site is 1.8mb. That's around 12tb/month. I don't know of any host willing to do 12tb of data for $50/12 I don't understand it either :/ I will ask my hosting provider.
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Don’t! :) I already did :)
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I'm glad you have a subscription option. As a policy I don't turn my adblocker off, but I'll totally subscribe as your rates are quite reasonable! If you're around and don't mind answering, how many subscriptions do you have? There are hundreds of people paying for Premium :) so about 0.01% of all users :)
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How much do you think you're losing out because of adblockers? It is hard to tell, maybe between 10 to 40 percent :/
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You should implement a donation feature as well, to offer more ways for users to support you. People can already order a Premium. I think it is better to get something in return (removing ads), so anybody who wants to support us can do it :)
First of all, thank you for making a great alternative. My question is, how would you compare Photopea to The Gimp in terms of features and interface? The interface of Photopea is closer to Photoshop than GIMP (so it is more comfortable to Photoshop users). I think all you can do in GIMP you can do in Photopea, but with a different workflow. You can open GIMP files (XCF) in Photopea.
There are many advanced features in Photopea, that are not in GIMP. The most important is probably the full support of a PSD format.
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Have to confess I'd never heard about this software until reading your post, but your mention of the PSD feature makes me want to check it out immediately. I admire your determination, dedication, and skills. Thank you :)
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Does it support vectors better than Photoshop? I don't like how limited it is in Photoshop. Even illustrator is annoying Photopea can open SVG and PDF images better than Photoshop. Just try it!
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Thank you for your program. I use it to make memes and do photoshopped things! You are welcome! I am happy that Photopea is useful to you :)
How did you learn how to make software? I was interested in computers since I was 14. I was studying computer science at the university between 18 and 25 years of age.
I studied theoretical computer science at the Charles university in Prague. Finishing the university was probably the hardest thing in my life (I do not enjoy learning as much as I enjoy creating stuff). But I also think it was the most valuable and productive part of my life and I am very proud of it :)
Here to say I've been using it, maybe the only white listed site on my ad-block. What was the hardest part to implement? The advanced foreground selection was quite hard. It is used e.g. in MagicCut. I wanted to reach the quality of remove.bg (where you pay $2 per image), but it still does not work that well.
Anyway, I think MagicCut works better than all other free tools and many commercial tools, so it can save you a lot of money :)
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You should look at U-2 Net https://github.com/NathanUA/U-2-Net a recently released paper with code that has amazing results I know quite a lot about this research :) The problem is, that people use Photopea for free, so it would have to run on their computers. They would have to download a 200 MB network, and unless they don't have a $2000 GPU, they would have to wait for hours to do such foreground / background detection.
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From the paper: "To facilitate the usage of our design in computation and memory constrained environments, we provide a small version of our U2-Net, called U2-Net† (4.7 MB). The U2-Net† achieves competitive results against most of the SOTA models (see Fig. 1) at 40 FPS." Unless there's something similar but better or they're outright lying, 4.7 MB sounds like an extremely reasonable memory footprint and it's pretrained so nobody's going to max out their GPU. You might want to give it another look. Wow, that sounds great, I will put it into my issues: https://github.com/photopea/photopea/issues/2368
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Not 100% sure, but a GPU is needed to train the network (which can take hours) and the trained networks usually do things in seconds or even faster. Users would still need to download the network, but it wouldn't be very computationally expensive. Such trained network can process the input in seconds on the GPU. If you process the input of the network on a CPU (even with multiple cores), it can take minutes or even hours. And training on a CPU can take weeks :)
I use Photopea regularly when developing web sites. I don't have to fire up my VM or limit myself to GIMP or Krita. The third most popular tech magazine in the Czech Republic, Letem světem Applem, was developed with the help of your tool. Díky! My question: will you ever open-source Photopea, at least partially? Hi, thanks a lot!
A huge part of Photopea is open-sourced and available at https://github.com/photopea?tab=repositories
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I'm scared to even open that repo 😂. What hosting provider are you using that can handle 5 million users in a year? I have a local hosting provider from the Czech Republic. It is just distributing HTML, CSS and JS files (no server-side computations like PHP or SQL databases), so it is not that hard.
Hi! Two questions 1. Does photopea have support for RAW photo files of varying cameras? (.ARW for example) 2. Why do you think Adobe charges so much for their platform when your model is clearly fairly simple to produce (if one person can do it alone) and functions profitably? Hi! Yes, Photopea can open .DNG, .CR2, .NEF and .ARW files :)
There are programs that are much more expensive than Adobe products :) It is hard to tell, but I think it is because there are no reasonable alternatives, or the alternatives are not known very well.
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As a Fuji user, .RAF support coming at some point? Hi, the .RAF format was invented by Fuji and has never been publicly described anywhere. I tried to ask Fuji to provide a description of their format, so that I can implement it into Photopea, but nobody replied :(
I think Fuji does not want you to open their files in any other software than their software.
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I don't think fuji has their own editing software, most people use either Capture One or Lightroom, or Irident X-Transformer to convert into a DNG Photopea can open DNG without any problems :) but it is a real pity they don't store it in DNG directly.
I just discovered this software and it is bloody amazing. As a hobby animator, I'm wondering - Do you have any plans, or have you at least thought about, making an animation software in the same way you have achieved this? Something like Adobe Flash/Animate or Toon Boom Harmony. (I'm already sold on your idea for a video editor, since Davinci Resolve's free version has NEVER been able to render videos for me without crashing) There is a distinct lack of reasonably priced animation software that achieves nearly as much as these two ridiculously expensive subscription programs, without sacrificing something really important to animation. The closest thing to achieving what Animate or Harmony has is Blender's new 2d animate mode, and even then, you have to sacrifice convenient features like easy tweening. An alternative free (or one-purchase) animation software would make me - and so many other people happy. Now that I know this software exists, I'll be sure to donate to its production. Thanks! You are not the first one asking for this :) I wish I could make so many tools, but I am afraid my life is too short for all that work :D
If I manage to make a good team of programmers in the future, I would love to make such animation software.
Is there a comprehensive guide I can find for all the tools in photopea? I’m new to photo editing and still confused by the interface. Photopea is an advanced editor and it is hard to learn simply by using it. I wrote a manual here: www.Photopea.com/learn .
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You made documentation? What kind of unholy programmer from the abyss are you? Don’t let our bosses find out or we’re screwed. I made it after several years of explaining people how to do things in emails, etc :) Now, I can simply send them links to my documentation. It took me less than a week :D
I love using photopea! I open it almost daily. Is there a way to review the source and contribute pull requests? Have you thought about providing an offline or self-hosted release? Thanks! The open-source parts of Photopea are published on our GitHub: https://github.com/photopea?tab=repositories . We provide a self-hosted versions for money, as it needs to be updated regularly.
How would you compare it to photoshop? Photopea has about 90% of features of Adobe Photoshop, but there are some features of Photopea that Photoshop doesn't have (e.g converting PDF, SVG, Sketch, XD, Figma to layered PSD documents).
Also, only Photoshop and Photopea fully support the PSD format, so I think Photopea is the best alternative to Photoshop at the moment.
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What do you think about GIMP? GIMP is great, but it can not work with PSD files properly. Also, the interface is quite different from Adobe Photoshop, and it is hard to use for former Photoshop users.
https://www.facebook.com/photopea/photos/a.1703140446613703/2373211539606587/
Do you pronounce it photo-pea, or photo-pee-ah? I pronounce it Photo-pea, but most of people pronounce it photo-pee-ah.
It is probably the most asked question in our subreddit :) /photopea.
EDIT: I did a quick search and here is what I found :)
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Good to know I got its pronunciation right :D I like photos and I like peas. What made you call it photopea? I wanted it to be PhotoSomething, and I wanted a domain PhotoSomething.com . Most of domains were occupied, until I found Pea :)
Not a question, but I just want to put this out there for all the non-developers, but the fact that Photopea was created by a single programmer is absolutely astounding. As a developer myself, I cannot fathom the productivity of this developer nor have I ever met someone that could be this productive. Teams of 10-20 developers could not match the functionality and feature list of photopea. And actually, here is a question after all, have you ever recorded or livestreamed yourself coding? I'm having a hard time imagining the pace required to be this productive. Do you have an estimate of the number of hours you have put into this? Hi, thanks a lot! I think I put between 15 000 and 20 000 hours into Photopea :) I never recorded myself programming, but most of it is just staring into the wall thinking, opening Youtube or Reddit from time to time (to "relax" a bit), and I writing code once in a while :)
Any chance your program can export files to work with a cnc machine? Sure, just tell me what format does that machine accepts? Is than an open format? Can you use e.g. an SVG?
Manufacturers often create their proprietary formats to make you dependent on their software.
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G-Code is pretty common, although I'm unsure as to what Z-axis information you would capture in an image format unless it was texturized somehow and interpreted that as topography? Maybe like the color coded images to show 3 dimensions in a planar view. I know lasewaterjet cutting and similar that do 2D operations typically ask me for a DXF file or equivalent. I've never used Photopea for this (or even tried) but typically I take a vector format and import into CAD software to generate a DXF for this purpose. I know my media guy can never get me a format I need to import a logo and such for mechanical design. A DXF or similar vector would be amazing if it doesn't exist already. Hi, would you be able to write this into our GitHub? https://github.com/photopea/photopea/issues . And most importantly, would you be able to discuss it there with me, if I have any questions? I never worked with any CNC machine.
Hi !! Can I know about your backend ? There is a webhosting which stores one HTML, one CSS and several JS files. Photopea is written in Javascript and runs completely in a computer of the visitor.
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Have you used any frontend frameworks? No, I wrote my own Javascript, HTML and CSS. I usually prefer to use what I know, instead of learning how to use new tools :)
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How do you handle users that pay for premium? There must be some sort of database right? Yes, there is a database. I just wanted to say, that out of these 7 million people, the database is needed maybe for a hundred of them.
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Not without dinner first Take my upvote, too :)
Are there any new browser features or HTML features that will make your code a lot simpler? I would love if browsers let Photopea know, when Ctrl+T was pressed on the keyboard. People have been using the Ctrl+T shortcut in Adobe Photoshop for decades and almost every week, someone asks why it does not work in Photopea.
At the moment, when you press Ctrl+T in any browser, it opens a new tab (panel), and a we can not do anything about it :( I have been personally arguing about it with browser developers for over five years.
"Fighting" with browser developers is quite a big part of my work, which is quite sad :(
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When in fullscreen Ctrl+T works in both Chrome and Edge, it triggers the transform tool. Maybe prompt the user to switch Photopea to fullscreen ? The website feels like a standalone app so it makes sense to get rid of the browser UI anyway. I think the Ctrl+T should be usable even when not in the fullscreen mode.
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I'm sure you must've researched this thoroughly over the years but maybe stackoverflow seems to have a couple good answers on disabling new tab shortcut keys. Maybe have a look? Esp these 2: 1 - https://stackoverflow.com/questions/38442886/chrome-disable-ctrlt-shortcut - you could make your own extension and then make that extension do the "Free Transform"? 2 - https://stackoverflow.com/questions/18625091/how-to-disable-firefox-new-tab-action-when-pressin-ctrl-and-clicking-a-link-wi I'm no good at js but maybe have a look... I guess I could also just make my own web browser and ask users to install it :D
How about a Desktop version? That'd be great! You can go to Photopea.com and press More - Install Photopea. It will add an icon to your homescreen, which will start Photopea without the browser UI. But it works only in the latest Chrome, Edge and Opera. https://www.facebook.com/photopea/photos/a.1703140446613703/2120885974839146
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What Api does that? Seems chromium only but i wouldn't care. Never heard of that. It is called PWA - progressive web apps, and the app can trigger the installing process https://medium.com/@dhormale/install-pwa-on-windows-desktop-via-google-chrome-browser-6907c01eebe4
What are your plans for the video editor, and how can I keep up to date on its progress? (video editor here that loves what you did with photopea) I do not have any specific plans about the video editor yet. You can follow Photopea on Facebook or Twitter to know about the progress (links in my original post) :)
You mentioned your income is through ads. Have you thought of other avenues for revenue sources or ways to increase your current revenue even more to be able to hire more employees? Yes, I have thought about it, but I don't know about any ways, which could work better than ads.
Most of the current Photopea user can not afford to pay for the software, so I don't want to make half of features available only after the payment.
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Would a premium version that's identical in features but without ads be an option? Unless this is already a thing? It is already a thing :) You can hide ads for $10 for three months. Also, there is no subscription, you pay manually any time you want. Ads come back once it runs out :)
What things does Photoshop do better than your alternative? Photoshop can open almost all RAW image formats (in their Camera Raw program). I think Adobe pays the camera manufacturers, so that they allow Adobe to open raw files from their cameras.
At the moment, Photopea can open only four RAW formats, which cover around 80% of the market.
Do you think that photopea has been a success? I use it for work everyday and I certainly think it is! I think it is the most useful thing I made in my life so far, so it is a success :)
Good stuff. Love a free image editor. Why is this already on the front page, with just 6 comments and 22 points? I don't know much about the Reddit algorithm, but I think it is also about how old the post is. E.g. if you get 20 points in 5 minutes, you will be on top of a post, which received 50 points in an hour.
What's your favourite video game? Also thank you the amount if complete trash I have cropped using photopea is immeasurable I received my first computer when I was 13 and PC games seemed too complicated to me (and most of them were in English, which I did not know well). I never had a playstation or a gameboy. So I never played video games much.
The first game I "understood" and truly enjoyed playing was Serious Sam :) I also spent A LOT of time playing Clash of Clans.
Will it stay free or is there a possibility that you're gonna put a price on that? Photopea has been free to use since the first release seven years ago, and I would like to keep it free to use in the future, too.
Love photopea, I use it all the time! Does anyone trouble you with any legal issues since it's basically an online photoshop? Thanks! I think the similarity of the interface of Photoshop and Photopea (and other photo editors) is a good thing. Imagine if each brand of computers had a different layout of a keyboard, because they wanted to be "different". I am very happy, that I can simply take any keyboard and start typing on it right away.
Maybe one time someone will come and say, that we have to make the background red, because the dark grey color is already used in their program. And we have to rename the Brush tool to "hair on a stick tool", because the Brush tool is already used in their program. But I hope such time will never come :D
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Please make an April 1st version with copyright-friendly tools, that would be awesome. Brush – Hair on a stick Bucket – Metal container Move – Relocate and so on. Edit: April Tools’ Day That is a graet idea! :D
How do you approach creating something that is intuitive? How do you know that your logic is universally understood? Are there any examples of tools, tasks, icons that you have had to change based on feedback? Thank you and great work! The user interface of Photopea has been evolving for seven years and there were probably hundreds of suggestions from users, which I listened to and modified, to get what we have now :)
Hi Ivan, I've used Photopea for a couple of years for basic editing. Congratulations - it's an amazing tool. The only feature that prevents me from upgrading to a paid version is the font selection interface. There are far too many fonts available, they load slowly, are all obscure and not represented well in preview. Would you consider curating/refining the available fonts? Hi, thanks! It is completely fine to use Photopea for free, you don't have to pay for Premium :)
You can mark some fonts with a star, and then, you can display only the "starred" fonts. You can use filters to see e.g. only "sans" fonts and hide "comic" or "handwritten" fonts. You can enable Latin-1 and other language categories, to see only fonts with many letters (only professional fonts support more than 200 letters).
Have you experienced any pushback/pressure from the bigger players? No :) I have been in touch with people from Google, Adobe, Corel, Canva and other companies, evrybody was very friendly and helpful :)
Thanks for making Photopea- I'm certainly loving it. Will there ever be an offline version? Hi, thanks!
A big challenge is, that Photopea can not use fonts from your computer, and it downloads fonts from our server, when you choose to use that font. So changing fonts would not work in an offline version (except of a couple of fonts we could pre-store).
I think the amount of time people spend using their computer offline is decreasing, and will be almost zero at some point :)
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If I use a font I have purchased, is it easy to implement, if you don't have that font on your server? Hi, just press File - Open in Photopea to load a font (TTF or OTF file) :)
Do you plan to keep photopea solely browser based? Many people think that browser programs are slower or "less capable" than desktop programs, but it is not true in the last five years. So a "download and install" version of Photopea would not have many advantages.
I could provide an offline version of Photopea, but at the moment, most of money come from ads, which would not work offline :/
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You can try and make an Electron app, I know its essentially a browser but it would give that "native" feel to users. Hi, you can already press More - Install Photopea in Photopea and use it as a PWA :)
Great. Now can we please start working on a viable PDF editor that doesn't cost hundreds of dollars per year? Photopea can already do it to some degree :) have you tried it?
The PDF format was not meant to be edited further. But we are improving.
Thanks for developing Photopea. After your last AMA, I started using it. Is there a way for size of a new document to default to image dimensions on the clipboard? That's one of the handiest things in Photoshop so you don't have to either enter manually or overguess then crop down later. The size of a new document should be set by default to the dimension of the content of the clipboard.
But it works only in Chrome, Edge and Opera. Firefox did not implement the necessary standard yet. Don't know about Safari :/
You mentioned you plan on making a video editor. Have you considered an Illustrator alternative as well? Photopea already has many vector-related capabilities. It can open, edit and save SVG and PDF files. Somehow, I feel like a video editor would be more fun to make than an advanced vector editor.
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Didn't know it supported editing SVGs. How does it compare to something like Inkscape? The interface is a lot different than Inkscape. Just try it and see how it works :)
I know this is a long shot, but any chance I can join on board with little to no knowledge so I can learn (for free of course)? 😁 It could be doing menial tasks for all I care. If not, any advice for someone like me wanting to change career path and code? I'm just tired of what I've been doing so I just recently starting some online coding courses but would like to learn more hands on if possible. Hoping to change career path for the future. Well, if I spend time teaching you, I will have to invest less time into developing Photopea :D
I have been often tired of what I did, I get tired of Photopea-related work from time to time. There is not just a bad job and a good job, there are many things in between. But whenever you have to choose between a simple goal and a hard goal, don't be afraid to go for a hard goal :)
How did you begin to scale up the workforce? What positions did you prioritise and how did the recruitment process go? I'm in an early process of starting up a web application and can see it being difficult going from working alone on a project to trusting people to share the same determination to grow it. Thanks I do not have any team, I still work on Photopea alone.
Hi. Great stuffs. I will definitely give it a try soon. May I give a suggestion ? I use GIMP for Image editing since I usually have to make some illustrations for my work. And GIMP provides me with the function of adding Text from another format, like LaTeX (to write math formula). Do you think this would be possible to implement in your app ? Hi, is the LaTeX text rasterized to pixels after you insert it? Or you can modify it in GIMP?
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the LINUX version of GIMP has a module in the Render section which allows me to type in the LaTeX code and product an image of the formula. I am not really used to the terminology of image like vector or raster image. But once the formula is produced, it is not modifiable. So if I messed up, I have to redo the process from the beginning. We don't have such thing in Photopea at the moment.
I used to write my masters thesis in https://www.sharelatex.com/ . You can also convert LaTeX to a PNG image here: http://latex2png.com/ (right-click the image - Copy Image, and paste it in Photopea).
Can it do animations? The only thing I use photoshop for at this point is it's animation ability, especially it's keyframe animations, where you can make a single frame last however many seconds you like. If it can do that, i can finally delete photoshop. Hi, we do not have such animation capabilities as Photoshop. But there is a special mechanism for making animations from layers: https://www.photopea.com/learn/animations
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This kind of animation capability is exactly what I was looking for. Does it allow you to view the animation as a preview before you choose EXPORT? Of course :) Just drag-and-drop a GIF into Photopea and try to export it as a GIF, it will take you around seven seconds :)
what was your eureka moment for photopea that whoa this is possible? Sometimes, when I learn about a new algorithm or a method, I wonder how elegant and ingenious it is :) Like - the person who came up with it should have been really smart, I wish I was also that smart :D
Have you considered using Patreon? Have you considered letting people subscribe for a fixed period if no ads? Hi, we already offer a Premium account, where you pay and it hides ads for a period of time. I know about Patreon, but I feel a bit uncomfortable about accepting money for nothing in return.
Is there a downloadable version available/in the works? You can go to www.Photopea.com and press More - Install Photopea, to get an icon to your homescreen.
https://www.facebook.com/photopea/photos/a.1703140446613703/2120885974839146
i tried using it on my display tablet, there doesn't seem to be any pressure sensitivity? Hi, try to update your tablet (drivers, browser, os, etc). But it works on the latest iPad and on my old Android phone (it tracks the pressure of my finger). If it does not help, try to report it to the tablet manufacturer (as it will not work in any website, not just Photopea).
Is there support for sprite editing tools or just tools in general for game devs? Do you mean generating sprites, etc? It can do most of things Photoshop can do, but if you need something more, you can always suggest it here :) https://github.com/photopea/photopea/issues
What made you decide to create a free photo editor? It was just an experiment of analyzing PSD files in a browser. I gradually improved it. I did not want to make a photo editor during the first two years of work. But at some point, I realised - hey, it should not be that hard to make it into a photo editor.
How is this compared to GIMP? Hi, you can read this article: https://www.techrepublic.com/article/photoshop-alternative-no-its-not-gimp/
But it is about Photopea from two years ago. Photopea improved significantly since then.
So is it WASM or just regular old JS + WebGL? I found this looking for a browser based paint.net alternative a while back and thought it was awesome, but the controls were a bit too advanced/inaccessible for my requirements. If you're serious about growing the dev team I'm a self employed engineer if you want to hit me up. I wrote only JS and GLSL (for GPU processing). I use three WASM libraries, which I did not make. Thanks for your offer, but I would like to hire someone I could work with in person.
I’ve been using photopea ever since your previous AMA a year ago. My question is: how often are do you AMA and how did it impact traffic to photopea? I did only three AMAs with about a year between them. The traffic grows by about 10 - 20%, which lasts for a day or two :)
How much time have you invested in creating this tool? Or what's your weekly time investment? I never measured it, but I think it is about the "regular" 40 hours a week.
Did you know most of what you needed before starting on Photopea or did you learn as you went along with adding new features? What unexpected difficulties presented themselves while working on Photopea? It is like I knew how to use a chisel, but I never carved a statue that big.
I learned many practical things (state-of-art algorithms etc), I used many things I learned at the university, which I thought I will never use :)
How do I start contributing to Photopea? What would you like to contribute with? You can help us find bugs or help beginners at our subreddit: www.reddit.com/photopea
I hope this hasn't been asked, but why haven't you made a downloadable/fully offline version of your program yet? I know that as soon as you load the site you can use it offline, but there are times when people need to edit pictures without any internet connection at all. The online version makes it much easier to release new versions and do updates. I update Photopea about 30 times a week (with minor fixes).
Also, it feels a little uncofmortable to imagine, that someone is using a two year old version of Photopea and is cursing me because of some bug, which I already fixed, and I can not do anything about it at that moment :/
What technologies did you use to build this? I used Javascript and WebGL :)
It's really great that you're offering an alternative to Photoshop! I was wondering, what language or software did you use to write Photopea? I wrote my code in Javascript, but in my opinion, the language is not important at all.
The best language is the one you know how to use. Also, for me, it is important, that there is a way to execute my code fast, which is possible with Javascript in modern browsers.
[removed] Hi, you should not use Auto-translate, as we have a professional Swedish translation. Just press More - Language - Svenska. You can switch languages without restarting Photopea.
Photopea.com should be in Swedish the first time you open it, if Swedish is set as your main language.
What's your End User Licensing Agreement looking like? How is this licensed? I like to know before end users start requesting such as im sure someone now wants to install this in a corporate environment... Photope works in your computer and it never sends any data outside your computer. It is just like buying the cheapest calculator and using it. You don't get a licence to use such calculator, the numbers that you enter into a calculator don't leave the calculator.
Our terms of service are here: https://www.photopea.com/privacy.html
What's your opinion of the current state and direction of front-end development? I think I don't know much about it. I write my JS code in notepad and that code is precisely the code which runs in the browser of a user (without any modification). I did not change the way I develop webapps in the last six years.
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Straight up Windows Notepad? Not notepad++ or Visual Studio Code or Atom or anything else??? I use Notepad++ :)
Are you planning in translating it? If so, I'd be glad to work on the italian version. Hi, it is already translated into 40 langauges, just press More - Language - Italiano :)
Hey Ivan, i'm very impressed by your work, but i'm an avid GIMP user. As you can imagine switching editors is always a hassle once you've got used to one. So can you give me some bullet points why it would be worth to switch from GIMP to Photopea? Thanks for the AMA! Hi, I think you should stay with GIMP, since you already know how to use it :) And if there is nothing specific you miss in GIMP, you probably don't need such features :)
Hey ivanhoe90 I noticed today that the pen tool behaves backward when clicking the second point and dragging. It's like the curve goes the opposite direction than anyone would expect. I almost filed a github issue on it but I just didn't have time. Is that a bug? Oh, I am very sorry, it is fixed now.
Hi, I wanted to know what's your story. That is your biography. And what did you study too get here? How did you get the idea for photopea? Hi, I gave a talk about it in France a year ago :) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IZmaeC_Ma5A
DUDE! Your program saved me in the final semester of my Masters. I needed to upload images and I don't have a scanner so I used my phone and fixed the colour and tones in Photopea. Bless you for your hard work. I guess my question is what kind of cheese do you like? Thanks a lot! If you only knew how happy I am about such comments :)
I like all cheeses, as I think they are all amazing, each one in a different way.
I love this software and I use it daily, Every time I think to myself "I wonder if can also do" the answer has been yes. I love showing my co-workers this software while working in Citrix, it always blows people away that this works. Question: Any change of seeing a feature that doesn't automatically export local files to the download folder? I would love to select where I want to automatically save them or just save as > location (The google drive system already amazing though) It's that one minor thing that makes me end up with File(17).png Hi, thanks! The saving mechanism depends on the settings of the web browser. The browser usually handles the file saving the same way for all websites. So just change the browser settings - make the browser ask you about where you want the files to be saved (we can not do anything about it as a website).
Do you think Photopea can have more active users than Photoshop? And why? It is hard to tell. There are many features in Photoshop and other editors, which Photopea can not do. Even if Photopea has more active users, it does not mean it makes more money.
Well I'm 9 hours late and maybe it was already asked and answered, but if you feel like responding... do you have to recreate stuff like puppet warp or quick select from scratch? Like you have to go back and read some old white paper on the algorithm, and then sort of reinvent the wheel? Hi, that is correct, there are usually no free implementations of such algorithms, and if there are, they are not in Javascript or are not good enough :/
Actually, the Puppet Warp is based on a 2009 paper from Takeo Igarashi. I found a mistake in it and I wrote him an email, and it took me several emails to persuade him that he really made a mistake in his paper :) But many other authors refuse to look deep into papers they wrote a long time ago.
Who would you prefer Photopea being aquired by, and why? I don't know. I am not looking for an acquisition at the moment.
I'm getting into video editing. I'm a noob to photoshop and video editing. Are there any tools in this that can complement my video editing? I was thinking of being able to create custom graphics for the videos but what else are the capabilities? I dont know much about video editing, but you can use Photopea for photo editing. I think the more time you spend learning a tool, before actually using it, the less time you will spend in total (e.g. doing something by "trial and error" in 3 hours vs. learning it in 1 hour and doing it in 30 minutes, because you learned how to do it).
How were you able to acquire such a vast amount of knowledge about editors and programming? I studied programming at the university for many years. Learning how to use Photoshop or any other editor is easier, but still can take weeks or months.
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I'm currently studying programming at uni too. Am I correct in assuming that the vast majority of the code for photopea is JavaScript since it's a web application? Yes, I wrote my programs in Javascript :) But I did not have any Javascript class ever in my life. I think the programming skills are not related to the knowledge of a specific programming language.
Could you comment on https://github.com/photopea/JS-guide a bit? I don't quite understand why you're against using syntactic sugar. Especially let, const, and strict equality. I'm not claiming to be an expert at all, but most of these guidelines are in opposition to modern day JS practices. So I was just curious if you could elaborate on your decision making! I think it is up to you what you write. But I am used to writing as "simple" code as possible, and it just looks cleaner to me if you use "var" instead of let/const (and it has no impact on the speed).
[deleted] I think the knowledge is the most important. Also, it should be someone friendly, calm, rational, etc :D
Hey, I don't know if this has been asked before but since you have mentioned that Photopea can run offline after it's been loaded (meaning that there is no server backend), have you ever considered packing the app into a desktop app (e.g. with Electron or nw.js)? Hi, I think opening a website is faster and more comfortable than downloading and installing something. Also, the electron version would be hard to update (unless it is just an iframe with Photopea inside it).
Have you ever considered making Photopea into a mobile app? Hi, half of our users use Photopea on phones. It works quite well. If you look for "photopea" on Youtube, most of videos are recorded on phones.
My Reddit client doesn’t have a comment search feature, but have you considered bundling an electron version for people to download? Seems like a quick win, and even gets around ad blockers. Or if it’s a premium only offering, is just icing on the cake Hi, I was a bit lazy to maintain a separate version of Photopea. I don't see any advantages it would have over the basic version.
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2020.09.21 00:23 velly_harsh [RF] Remembrance

I woke up to the noise of heavy breathing that my 11-year-old younger brother, Aryan made. Every time he wakes up with heavy breathing and sweaty face, meant that he saw the same nightmare. Waking up like this, he would remain upset the whole day, probably searching for the meaning of it. As an elder sister, I am always concerned about his mental health. I have asked him about his dream on many occasions, and he always has the same answer, “I saw a woman screaming as if she was dying”. He started seeing this dream when he was 4 years old. He ran from his bed to our mother and hugged her like he always does, waking up like that. I wonder how terrifying it would be while dreaming like that. Horrific, or maybe this is one of his tricks to get attention from others. Thinking all this I went to sleep again.
Later in the morning, I went down to see my dad and uncle Vinod. Uncle Vinod, My Dad’s younger brother visits us every day after the morning jog. He loves us a lot and often brings me and my brother gifts. He lives alone, as his wife, my aunt Megha died long back. My dad thinks that my uncle feels lonely, so we decided to move to a place closer to his home, to which we will be shifting today. It would be even more fun if he agrees to live with us, rather than living alone. I believe it's hard to live alone, no one to talk to, no one to tell how your day went, no good or bad news to share with. A pretty boring way to live I guess.
Later that day, when we were shifting luggage to our new home, I slipped on the floor, while carrying a carton full of old papers to my parent’s room. Suddenly, when I was putting all the old papers back into the box, I found a medical report that stated an abortion that my mother had 13 years ago. I am 15 years old, so the report was 2 years since I was born. I was shocked to see that and began to recollect any memories of that time. But I couldn’t recall anything. Maybe I was too young at that time to remember anything.
My mother called me from the dining room “Riya, is everything okay there? I heard some noise.”
I replied, “Yes all good here. The carton box fell by mistake”
My mother said “Okay, come to the dining room quickly. Dinner is ready. We can do this later.”
I took a photograph of the report while searching for anything else and replied “Yeah, coming. In a minute.”
With all the doubts jumping in my head, I sat with my family at the dinner table. I thought If I should ask mom directly what was the report all about or should I chose to avoid the awkward encounter.
My dad started the conversation saying, “Does anyone remember how long we lived in the old house?”
Aryan quickly said, “Oh! I know that. We shifted into the old house On 2nd June 2011. So, we lived there for 9 long years”
Neither mom nor dad was sure about the date too I guess.
Dad said, “That’s right, We lived there for 9 years. I miss the old house.”.
Aryan is good at recalling distant memories, that are like his superpower. I asked him “How do you remember it so correctly ?”
Aryan replied slowly, “I don’t know. I just remember... everything.”
While the usual family conversations were going on, I thought it’s better to investigate about the abortion report myself rather than asking my parents. Anyway, in the end, I can ask my mum. I discreetly opened my phone to check the photograph and saw that the abortion was done at Apollo Hospital.
I began to wonder where I was born, so I asked at the table “mum, dad, in which hospital was I born?”
Mom replied, “At the Apollo Hospital. Why do you ask?”
I replied, “Nah, just curious”.
Aryan said, “I was born there too, right Mom?”.
I replied, “Yes, you were too”.
Later at night, while going to sleep, I thought Apollo hospital can be a good starting point. But why did my parents choose to abort a child? Maybe I’ll find something out from the records at the hospital. But the staff won’t give that information away just like that, I needed a contact. I remember my friend, Abha, mentioning that her elder sister Monika works there as a receptionist. Maybe she can help.
The next morning, I contacted Abha for Monika’s number. I contacted Monika on call and explained to her the situation. She told me that they may find some information from the records but it can be risky for her job if anyone caught her. After understanding the seriousness of the issue, she finally got convinced. She told me to come to the hospital at 8 pm, as all the staff goes for dinner at that time, and would be least risky to check records at that time.
Later that day, I reached the hospital and waited quietly for Monika to call me.
Monika called me up saying “Riya, come here, quickly”
I rushed there and told her “check the records for Reema Khatri“, which is my Mom’s name.
Monika typed it in the records and told me “There are 3 records by this name”.
I replied, “That should be correct, 1 abortion and 2 should be of me and my brother.”.
She seemed surprised to hear that and said, “No, 1 record is by your name and the other 2 are abortion”.
I was stunned to hear that as there was no record for Aryan’s birth and by the news of another abortion.
Monika asked, “Your brother must be born in some other hospital”.
I replied, “I guess so. Can you tell me the dates of the records”.
She said, “The first one in on 23rd July 2005, when you were born. Second on 18th Feb 2007 and the third one on 19th April 2009”.
I was completely puzzled, as Aryan was born on 23rd April 2009.
The only explanation that came to my mind of this was that Aryan was probably adopted.
I asked, “Monika, did they mention any reason for abortions?”.
She replied, “Nothing as such. But both the fetuses were female. At that time, around 10 years ago, the abortion policies were not strict. Many people used to abort a female child, as you know the culture here in our country. Maybe this was the reason.”
“Okay. Thanks a lot”, I said and left with a million questions.
Nothing made sense anymore. I was baffled. I couldn’t believe my parents would opt for abortion. I felt like I didn’t know my parents as a person, who they really are from inside. And why do parents in my culture still prefer boys over girls? It doesn’t happen in other countries like the United States. We all want our country India to be progressive, but how would it progress if our mentality is not developing. In our minds, we are still old fashioned and believe in caste, religion, gender discrimination. I thought my parents were better than that, better than the rest of the outdated mentality of society. I guess I was wrong. They were also a part of the same society, another brick in the wall.
I walked down from the hospital to my home, thinking if I should tell Aryan that he is adopted or not. I concluded that It would be better to let him know. He should know the truth, no matter how hard it is to swallow. He is strong and will take it positively.
I reached home and went straight to our room and told him the whole thing, about the abortions and how he can be adopted.
I regretfully told him, “So, I think you were adopted, because mom had the abortion around the same time you were born.”, I said. “If you want we can try to find your biological parents”.
“I know that. I also know who my biological parents are. Well, you know them too.”, he replied.
With all my confusion I asked, “Who are they?”.
He replied, “Uncle Vinod and Aunt Megha are my real parents. She died while giving me birth.”
I asked, “Since when do you know it?”
He replied, “I can recall every memory since I was born. I checked online, It said I have this condition called hyperthymesia.”.
“Is that why you have that same dream. Is that woman Aunt Megha in your dream?” I asked.
“Yeah, It’s her. I hear the screams she made while giving birth to me” he replied.
submitted by velly_harsh to shortstories [link] [comments]


2020.09.21 00:22 velly_harsh [RF] Remembrance

I woke up to the noise of heavy breathing that my 11-year-old younger brother, Aryan made. Every time he wakes up with heavy breathing and sweaty face, meant that he saw the same nightmare. Waking up like this, he would remain upset the whole day, probably searching for the meaning of it. As an elder sister, I am always concerned about his mental health. I have asked him about his dream on many occasions, and he always has the same answer, “I saw a woman screaming as if she was dying”. He started seeing this dream when he was 4 years old. He ran from his bed to our mother and hugged her like he always does, waking up like that. I wonder how terrifying it would be while dreaming like that. Horrific, or maybe this is one of his tricks to get attention from others. Thinking all this I went to sleep again.
Later in the morning, I went down to see my dad and uncle Vinod. Uncle Vinod, My Dad’s younger brother visits us every day after the morning jog. He loves us a lot and often brings me and my brother gifts. He lives alone, as his wife, my aunt Megha died long back. My dad thinks that my uncle feels lonely, so we decided to move to a place closer to his home, to which we will be shifting today. It would be even more fun if he agrees to live with us, rather than living alone. I believe it's hard to live alone, no one to talk to, no one to tell how your day went, no good or bad news to share with. A pretty boring way to live I guess.
Later that day, when we were shifting luggage to our new home, I slipped on the floor, while carrying a carton full of old papers to my parent’s room. Suddenly, when I was putting all the old papers back into the box, I found a medical report that stated an abortion that my mother had 13 years ago. I am 15 years old, so the report was 2 years since I was born. I was shocked to see that and began to recollect any memories of that time. But I couldn’t recall anything. Maybe I was too young at that time to remember anything.
My mother called me from the dining room “Riya, is everything okay there? I heard some noise.”
I replied, “Yes all good here. The carton box fell by mistake”
My mother said “Okay, come to the dining room quickly. Dinner is ready. We can do this later.”
I took a photograph of the report while searching for anything else and replied “Yeah, coming. In a minute.”
With all the doubts jumping in my head, I sat with my family at the dinner table. I thought If I should ask mom directly what was the report all about or should I chose to avoid the awkward encounter.
My dad started the conversation saying, “Does anyone remember how long we lived in the old house?”
Aryan quickly said, “Oh! I know that. We shifted into the old house On 2nd June 2011. So, we lived there for 9 long years”
Neither mom nor dad was sure about the date too I guess.
Dad said, “That’s right, We lived there for 9 years. I miss the old house.”.
Aryan is good at recalling distant memories, that are like his superpower. I asked him “How do you remember it so correctly ?”
Aryan replied slowly, “I don’t know. I just remember... everything.”
While the usual family conversations were going on, I thought it’s better to investigate about the abortion report myself rather than asking my parents. Anyway, in the end, I can ask my mum. I discreetly opened my phone to check the photograph and saw that the abortion was done at Apollo Hospital.
I began to wonder where I was born, so I asked at the table “mum, dad, in which hospital was I born?”
Mom replied, “At the Apollo Hospital. Why do you ask?”
I replied, “Nah, just curious”.
Aryan said, “I was born there too, right Mom?”.
I replied, “Yes, you were too”.
Later at night, while going to sleep, I thought Apollo hospital can be a good starting point. But why did my parents choose to abort a child? Maybe I’ll find something out from the records at the hospital. But the staff won’t give that information away just like that, I needed a contact. I remember my friend, Abha, mentioning that her elder sister Monika works there as a receptionist. Maybe she can help.
The next morning, I contacted Abha for Monika’s number. I contacted Monika on call and explained to her the situation. She told me that they may find some information from the records but it can be risky for her job if anyone caught her. After understanding the seriousness of the issue, she finally got convinced. She told me to come to the hospital at 8 pm, as all the staff goes for dinner at that time, and would be least risky to check records at that time.
Later that day, I reached the hospital and waited quietly for Monika to call me.
Monika called me up saying “Riya, come here, quickly”
I rushed there and told her “check the records for Reema Khatri“, which is my Mom’s name.
Monika typed it in the records and told me “There are 3 records by this name”.
I replied, “That should be correct, 1 abortion and 2 should be of me and my brother.”.
She seemed surprised to hear that and said, “No, 1 record is by your name and the other 2 are abortion”.
I was stunned to hear that as there was no record for Aryan’s birth and by the news of another abortion.
Monika asked, “Your brother must be born in some other hospital”.
I replied, “I guess so. Can you tell me the dates of the records”.
She said, “The first one in on 23rd July 2005, when you were born. Second on 18th Feb 2007 and the third one on 19th April 2009”.
I was completely puzzled, as Aryan was born on 23rd April 2009.
The only explanation that came to my mind of this was that Aryan was probably adopted.
I asked, “Monika, did they mention any reason for abortions?”.
She replied, “Nothing as such. But both the fetuses were female. At that time, around 10 years ago, the abortion policies were not strict. Many people used to abort a female child, as you know the culture here in our country. Maybe this was the reason.”
“Okay. Thanks a lot”, I said and left with a million questions.
Nothing made sense anymore. I was baffled. I couldn’t believe my parents would opt for abortion. I felt like I didn’t know my parents as a person, who they really are from inside. And why do parents in my culture still prefer boys over girls? It doesn’t happen in other countries like the United States. We all want our country India to be progressive, but how would it progress if our mentality is not developing. In our minds, we are still old fashioned and believe in caste, religion, gender discrimination. I thought my parents were better than that, better than the rest of the outdated mentality of society. I guess I was wrong. They were also a part of the same society, another brick in the wall.
I walked down from the hospital to my home, thinking if I should tell Aryan that he is adopted or not. I concluded that It would be better to let him know. He should know the truth, no matter how hard it is to swallow. He is strong and will take it positively.
I reached home and went straight to our room and told him the whole thing, about the abortions and how he can be adopted.
I regretfully told him, “So, I think you were adopted, because mom had the abortion around the same time you were born.”, I said. “If you want we can try to find your biological parents”.
“I know that. I also know who my biological parents are. Well, you know them too.”, he replied.
With all my confusion I asked, “Who are they?”.
He replied, “Uncle Vinod and Aunt Megha are my real parents. She died while giving me birth.”
I asked, “Since when do you know it?”
He replied, “I can recall every memory since I was born. I checked online, It said I have this condition called hyperthymesia.”.
“Is that why you have that same dream. Is that woman Aunt Megha in your dream?” I asked.
“Yeah, It’s her. I hear the screams she made while giving birth to me” he replied.
submitted by velly_harsh to stories [link] [comments]


2020.09.21 00:20 No_Persimmon7090 smallest to Largest Strangereal navies

so after while of finding the numbers and getting the additional ships i can now give you a list of a navy form the smallest to biggest so let's begin
  1. Ustian Navy: 25 ships and 0 Submarines
in last place and taking the crown for smallest navy in Strangereal is the Ustian Navy with 25 ships and no submarines so i hear Ustio doesn't have a navy well its very likely they do cause Ustio will probably have Lakes and Rivers that a small ship can operate in, their Navy is probably only made up of 14 new pt-16 class gunboats and despite being retired IRL I can see Ustio's navy repurposing the 11 Aquarius class gunboats as utility craft.
in our thirteenth spot is the Usean Navy from 1997 with 40 ships and 2 Submarines now because the Usean navy only canon appearance was in AC2/AC:AHL i only have those game's canon information to work with so unfortunately I can't give you up to date information however they couldn't have worse luck as 36 ships defected to the usean rebels and they lose their 2 super-submarines leaving a single aircraft carrier, frigate and two gunboat then as they are trying to rebuild the fleet an asteroid hits Usea then the Eruseans start a war further hurting the Usean military more and to rub salt they have to deal with Free Erusea and finally Erusea again boh no wonder GR takes over as the Usean military is shadow of its former self.
At number 12 is the Ratioan navy with 48 ships and 3 submarines which was not surprising given that its an obscure nation whose only conflict action was the belkan war wish we could see more of this nation.
to our eleventh spot we have the North Point Royal Navy with 65 ships and 11 submarines but fun fact if we lived in strangereal i'd be North Pointian and a small navy fits North Point but its one of the only Usean nations to have ballistic missile submarines which isn't bad to keep our number 10 spot in check.

At the number 10 spot is the Erusean Royal Navy with 97 ships and 10 submarines from 2019 before Trigger got his claws into them to go from a ruined navy in 2005 to moderately good sized navy in 14 years and to get 1 Alicorn class Submarine aircraft carrier is a sign it was well into recovering from its losses from the 1st continental war and become a regional power however thanks to idiotic radicals stupidity thinking they could pick a fight with our bronze place navy and left them with a wounded military and regional power in tatters.

now back to the Osean continent now with our 9th place the Royal Nordlands Navy with 120 ships and 4 submarines this navy heck this country is one I really wish to see more as had Erusea tried expanding into the Osean continent the Nordlands armed forces would have been the first force to fight them but i'd like to see a conflict involving the Nordlands so we can see what the Nordlands military is and how acts in a war.

at number 8 is Sapin Navy which has a fleet of 163 ships and 2 Submarines which despite the force size being the 4th smallest on the Osean continent and only likely seeing action in the belkan war is quite reasonable and had Torres succeeded then Erusea would have had to deal with an enraged Sapin military thank goodness Three Strikes and his team managed to stop him.

in seventh is the Republic of Emmeria Navy which has a fleet of 202 ships and 18 submarines which to go from 9 ships to 202 in the space of 5 years is an impressive recovery for a nation who likely didn't expect the war they ended up fighting.

just missing out on the top 5 is Republic of Aurelia Navy: 294 ships and 25 submarines which is small given its more heavily armed neighbour to the north which given the Aurelian war starts soon makes me wonder if Aurelia was too reliant on Osean protection that it let their military weaken cause despite advanced weapons like the meson cannon the Aurelian navy went from from 294 ships to 17 ships and a single submarine losing 94 percent of the surface fleet and 96 percent of the submarine is a devastating loss one Aurelia will need a long time to recover from and with Osea recovering themselves Aurelia was on its own luckily they had their own singularity in the form of Gryphus 1.

Into the top 5 now with the Yuketobanian Navy which has 323 ships and 67 submarines which for the 2nd global superpower is quite but its clear that the Circum-Pacific War left Yuketobania weaker I mean they had lost their only Admiral Kuzentov class carrier which only leaves their 2 Ulyanovsk class supercarriers and let's not forget losing both the 2 Scinfaxi class nuclear ballistic missile submarine and submarine aircraft carriers they had built and in complying with the Strategic Arms Reduction Treaty 2 meant they had to sell off the only Alicorn class nuclear ballistic missile submarine and submarine aircraft carrier to Erusea although the money probably helped them begin rebuilding their navy given the fact they lost 42 ships and 13 typhoon class ballistic missile submarines in one war which was likely the back bone of their nuclear deterrent fleet.
I do wanna see more of Yuketobania.
In fourth and missing the top 3 is Nordennavic Royal Navy with 591 ships and 11 Submarines and to be honest this surprised me that a nation that values its neutrality so much that it has a special fighter squadron to do its dirty work but still the Nordennavic government built a navy of a size between the 2 superpowers but i am curious to see how Nordennavic would handle having to fight a war against another nation.

Taking the bronze is Osean Maritime Defense Force with 685 ships and 109 submarines Yes I know we give Osea a lot of flak for its incompetence but the OMDF is still a force to be reckoned with despite losing ships to 2 separate wars but will Osea's navy be powerful again well yes they have lot of ships coming in the next several years after all the OMDF had lost half its carrier force in the war against Yuketobania a decade ago and by the time the lighthouse war started thy had more carriers than they did at the start of the Circum-Pacfic war but do I expect Osea to fight a war within the decade honest answer NO because Osea lost 19 ships from the fleet first sent the war against Erusea, its a guarantee that the Osean Navy will rise up like a phoenix from the ashes and blaze like a fire.

Taking the Silver is Verusan Liberation Army Navy with 697 Ships and 77 submarines now before I start on this one I have to admit that we don't know that Verusa is really the strangereal version of Chia and that i made it like that so I could write my anger at having my life upended by china given the current global situation we find ourselves in but putting that aside for a relatively unknown nation if it is strangereal China to have a fleet that is 12 ships bigger than Osea is very impressive but unfortunately for Verusa it makes them be seen by Osea as a growing threat to its hegemony so like how they stuffed the Belka economy Osea will do whatever it takes to cripple this growing superpower which i have no doubt that the Yuketobanians would see the same thing so in my headcanon well I think Trigger sums it nicely
"Since Verusa lost the court case they have to not only pay the penalties and legal fees and the global economy is wounded with the global satellite network in ruins and will take years to repair, which is a problem as Verusa's import economy is reliant on global trade but the Erusean drone strikes in the war have stuffed global trade till at least mid decade they think."
"With that false flag which I bet Osea had a hand in has damaged or destroyed one hundred and seventy-five Verusan Navy ships and all of these factors along with Osean economic sanctions has crashed their economy meaning the Vuan is worthless."
yeah I believe that global trade will take years to recover after the lighthouse and despite ACX saying Satellite communications were back online I think that it will take till mid-decade to rebuild the satellite network after what happened during the Battle for Farbanti last September.
and taking the gold medal is the Democratic People's Republic of Leasath Navy with 1032 ships and 85 submarines but is this number correct to absolutely honest no and the reason is the Leasath civil war from 2011 to 2019 as we have very little information on war happen and how other than how it ended meaning we have no the Leasath Navy split and what ships were involved on each side and how many were lost so is it likely to be smaller than Osea or Verusa almost certainly but how much smaller is likely never to be known unless we get an ace combat game covering that but given that I doubt the PA Team would risk covering a civil war in Strangereal North Korea given the bad tensions between Japan and North Korea nor A conflict with Strangereal China given the bad tensions between China and Japan these days as the Chinese Government would likely get upset and pressure Bandai Namco to force a change to the game
anyway what do you think of this ranking please share your thought in the comments below
I'll catch you all next time and remember gotta stay fly
submitted by No_Persimmon7090 to acecombat [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 23:59 More_Homework7085 Dancing with the Devil

a few weeks ago I matched with a gorgeous woman online. Just my type. Though, much more "hot" than me. I have a lot of confidence in myself but I also am a realist. I'm at best a 7/10 (but feel like im a 10/10). This woman was at least a 9/10. So by looks, she was way out of my league.
I came to find out she has a 4 year old child and never married. I dont know much about her ex, but I know he was a player, and slept with multiple women during their relationship together. This made me feel very cautious to even have a "friend with benefits" relationship with this woman, because I felt, whether she said it or not, that all she wanted to do was inflict pain on others that was once inflicted on her. And I even told her I thought this but she insisted it wasn't true and that she just wanted a real relationship.
I will add, I wasn't being 100% truthful with her. While I did find her to be a fun person to be around, I never saw myself having a true labeled relationship with her. Anyways...
we were snap chatting all day for the first week. I tried making plans, she said she was busy so I laid back. She then contacted me close to the end of the first week saying she's still interested and because I didn't want to seem desperate after already trying to make plans, I suggested we "play it by ear". That Friday, she slept with another guy, sent me pictures of her hickey the next day (Saturday) and apologized. I immediately blocked her and was gonna go on my Marry way.
She then finds me on Facebook, messages me, apologizing blah blah blah and I thought to myself "shit this woman is hot af, ill giver her another shot". We then talked and that next Wednesday, she invited me over her apartment where we had sex. Just walked in, talked, then took it to the bedroom. I ended up leaving eventually, we kept talking but I knew something was wrong. and I suspected it was because the sex was not meet expectations.
two or three days later, she invites me over again (I suggested ill bring wine, she was all about it). I got there and she jumped on me, kissed me. but then things didn't go how I wanted. she wanted to see my phone so she could "spice up" my dating profiles, and then she threw the "can we just be friends" at me. I said I'm sorry, im not interested in that with you, I think of you as more than a friend if the feeling isn't mutual, no hard feelings, I'll head out. and thats what I did. grabbed my shoes and started walking out. she blocked the door and literally wouldn't let me leave. she then threw herself on me, kissing me, then backed off. I wasn't sure what to do because one minute she's suggesting friend zone, then the next she's all over me. I ended up leaving and seeing her twice more (briefly, outside her apartment, to "talk").
she basically told me I dont have a big enough dick (I'm below average, about 4.5) and that she wanted to be just friends. I told her she wasn't interested, she blocked my number but then continued to message me on Facebook, saying things like "I'm getting shamble with friends this weekend". which I took as "I'm sleeping with other people this weekend".
this entire experience really turned me off because even thought this girl was nuts, she's made me feel like I won't be able to satisfy any woman and that eventually, I'm gonna get cheated on no matter what. NONE of a relationship with a woman matters, except for sex. You can't just wine and dine a woman, treat her right and call her yours. you could be a millionaire but if you dont satisfy her right in bed, she'll soon be in the arms of a man who can.
submitted by More_Homework7085 to dating [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 23:42 depressedthrowawy111 i know i'll never be loved and i don't know how to live with that

TLDR: emotional person who just wants to say stuff. nothing new.
i don't know how to begin this so i'll just jump in. i'm 27, have a penis, and have never been liked by anyone. i have no friends, and truly feel i never will, and no one will ever love me. i'm going to speedrun some "background info", so you know how i came to these realizations.
i coped with what i assumed were friends when i was in middle school, though i knew in the back of my head they never really like me. i was that one friend no one really liked and everyone avoided. was more of the butt of every joke and a punching bag. no one cared about my emotions, and we were only "friends" when it came to lunch time and they needed someone to mock. some girl in one of my classes pretended to be my gf for a while, until she realized i have no money to spend, then she let it out to everyone of her friends that she'd rather date her dog. at this point, i was covered in acne, and my hairline was already receding. i ditched them all.
high school came around and was the same, except i was only a "friend" during classes because i was the good-listener type. one girl even made a point to make it absolutely clear i shouldn't talk to her outside of class (though she did talking mostly anyway). still i had fooled myself into thinking i had some friends. after high school, that illusion went away. i would comment on statuses, and my comments were deleted. no one messaged, no one replied, nothing. i left that part of my life, figured it was pointless trying to be friends with people who don't want anything to do with me. graduation came, i didn't go. update on hair btw? i'm bald. 18, and the hair on the top of my head is so thin, you'd guess i'm 40 based off that alone. so now i'm forced to shave my head. needless to say self-esteem has never been lower, but wait, there's more.
soon after graduating, my family gets evicted, we live in a relative's house during which time: cheating parent abandons family leaving them to raise underage child without them, comes back, leaves again, abandonment and trust issues intensify, etc. back to me, i try for years to make friends online, and i suppose this is the best time to clarify what i am. i said i have a penis, but not my gender because i have never felt tied to my gender, much like i have never felt tied to my ethnicity. it doesn't define me, because i don't feel like i am a gender. sometimes i feel like a boy, other times a girl, and sometimes nothing at all. i guess the closest thing to classify me as is "genderfluid", though i'd still argue that's not entirely right. it's crucial to mention this because, as i tried finding friendships online, i would be a girl...and it didn't feel like a lie to me. "why is gender important when all i want is friends?" that's how i felt about it. i would say i'm a girl when people would ask, even if i didn't FEEL like a girl in the moment, because people treated girls nicer. What i didn't know was girls also get instantly ditched when someone tries getting "friendlier" with you and you don't reciprocate. that happened a lot. another thing that happened a lot was people who were only friends with people who had mics. obviously i can't hop on mic, so i was left out of these friendships. i could feel them liking me as a friend, growing closer, and then the mic popped up and acted as a roadblock. either way, no friendships online. sometime between all that my family rents a place (where we are now) so at least that issue is fixed.
i accepted for a few years that i'd be alone and i lied to myself about how cool it was. no drama, no birthdays, no one to worry over, no one to cry over should they die, no one to comfort through hard times, etc. every so often, the loneliness would set in and i would spiral through week-long bouts of depression, only to come out on top in time. so i thought i won. fuck you life, you threw everything at me except an ounce of kindness, and i came out on top. i didn't win...life always wins, because the game is rigged.
that's the quick rundown of my life 13-27. i left out some stuff because i didn't know where to put it, but i feel it's worth mentioning. like the abusive female "friend" in middle and high school who, if i'm being honest, i only tolerated because i had a crush on and her abusive nature was attractive to me for some reason. i asked her out, she crushed my heart, only to ask me to cheat with her while she had a bf 5 years later (i declined and we stopped being "friends" shortly after).
Or the girl i had a crush on for 9 years (elementary school to high school). i became friends with her, she ended up hating me. we talked about our problems but when the time came for me to talk about mine, she thought i was using and exploiting her kindness. said i use my sad life to make people pity me and guilt them into being my friend, not my intention, but i can't help but think about it in cases like this where i talk about being sad. it makes it near impossible to discuss my emotions with anyone, not that i have anyone to talk to. i've stopped liking her...i think, but i still dream of her every so often. it wouldn't be so bad if she would actually speak to me in the dreams, but she hates me there too. usually has a look of disgust or anger when she catches sight of me.
also, i recently discovered i am on the autism spectrum. i've always considered myself socially disabled, though i said it as a joke...turns out i've been right all these years. a disability that makes me have the social grace of a gorilla tripping on his balls and landing face-first in a pile of his own shit. who'd have thought? i would explain how horrible i am at talking socially, but i don't know how. the example i could give is how much i hate small talk. i want things to have a point. when someone messages "hi" i immediately want to reply "what do you want?". not out of rudeness or to subtly tell someone to leave me alone, but because i legitimately don't see the point to talking like that with someone i don't know. who are you? what do you want from me? i don't care about greeting you or how you feel. i only care about what you want from me.
all of this makes me feel i'll never be loved and can never make friends. 14 years. well, 22 really since i never truly found someone i could be friends with and out my trust into since i started trying (5 years old i guess since we all want friends when we start school). i've genuinely never felt i could trust someone. and no one has ever really liked me at all...worst part is, i can't really blame them. why settle for a broken down car at the same price of one that looks better and at least doesn't come with all these issues. it hurts, and i feel like my story will end the same no matter what. alone. sometimes.
either way, thanks for reading. i don't know why i wrote this. i don't know what i expect to come of this. i know i wouldn't want friends from this because it would be more "friends" who only "care" out of pity, and if i wanted that, i could've posted this on my main account and probably gotten pity friends from there too. i just needed it off my chest i guess. maybe if anything, tell me how to live like this? if you're like me, tell me what to do now that lying to myself doesn't work anymore. what do i do now that i have to face the truth? it hurts.

PS on a lighter note, i almost entirely forgot to mention, i also have a small penis, comes with bonus self-esteem issues and a fear of doing anything sexual, serving to amplify the thoughts of being alone forever...so that's fun.
submitted by depressedthrowawy111 to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 23:39 jippe1 I'm (28M) in a relationship with a married woman (29F) and I genuinely don't know if this is this the best or the worst thing ever to have happened to me

TL;DR - I fell madly in love with a woman who seemed like my perfect match, but she is married and things have been sliding downhill with countless fights, breakups, controlling and unfair treatment. She is doing her best to be the best person she can, but I have built so many blocks against her and we've been so horrible to each other that I don't see how this could ever work. Should I end it or stay?
---
Hello Reddit! It's actually my first post here ever... Seeking for advice and also to just write this down trying to process it myself.
Here we go:
About two years ago, I (28M) met the most drop-dead-beautiful girl (29F) at a party. I knew her name and the fact that she was married, but I never talked to her before this evening.
At some point of the party we were hanging out in the same group and as people left it was just me an her. She was super straightforward and spoke her mind, witty and smart. Really fun to talk to, just so lively and entertaining person. Oh and side note: there is no way for me to describe how gorgeous she looks - Imagine supermodel level 10/10 woman that no one can walk past without taking a second look. The most beautiful girl I've ever seen still to this day.
She took control of the conversation, that's how she is. I was basically just having a regular conversation with her because I knew she was married, so I tried not to be pushy. But she was being super flirty with me and we end up talking for a couple of hours. She explained that their marriage had gone bad, lot's of issues that they cannot work through. They were both done but they are still best friends and close - more of this soon... She said she's looking to get back to dating.
She was flirting with me a lot, but I'm shy and never took the initiative. Nothing really happened between us that night, I gave her a hug in the end of the night and she went home to her husband because they still lived together.
I stayed in touch with her online and each day we would spend more and more time talking to each other and getting closer. It became the best part of my day to talk to her and I started to fall in love with her even though we only met for that one night.
After a few weeks of talking online, she said she wants to do a trip but doesn't want to go alone, so she invited me to go with her. Like I said, we only met for that one night and only really knew each other online, so she wanted to take different hotel rooms for the trip incase something goes wrong or if we are not hitting it off. The hotel room I booked for myself ended up being a really expensive storage for my suitcase. I didn't sleep a single night in my own room and only went there to stock up on clean clothes and used the shower. We spent the most amazing week together and I just fell in love with her like never before in my life. The first months of our relationship were freaking epic. We had the best sex of my life, stayed up late just talking, doing trips and getting know each other. I was always little bit lacking with social skills and my emotions, and I never felt better talking to anyone than her. She really helped me a lot in handling my emotions, communication and being in touch with my feelings. I love her for this.
Now, let me talk a little bit about her marriage and relationship with her husband.
She told me a lot about herself and shared every detail of her past. She has had a rough life. She grew up with addict parents who kicked her out onto the street as a teenager. She lived on friends' and boyfriends' couches and on the street until her late teens. She's been doing what she can to make money. She's suffered abuse. But she built herself up from that rough situation with the help of her husband. She says that she wouldn't be here anymore without him. They basically grew up together and have known each other for more than a decade.
Over the years their relationship suffered from the strain of her past, and I can understand that she was a lot to handle given her past. He became violent towards her after sleepless nights taking care of her. It got to the point where she now has life-long problems from the injuries and will always need a little help with some physical tasks. She thinks he should be there for her because of what he did, to help her with things and support her.
Now, let me talk briefly about their current marriage. They are still married after 2 years of our relationship and their finances are tied and they are really close every way possible except for sex, romance or intimacy. More like best friends whose lives are built together and they depend on one another everyday. My girlfriend is really invested in her husband still and she is handling his bills, helping him with his work, they split meals at a restaurant etc. But she tells me that she wants to part ways with him as our relationship becomes stronger. This really bothers me sometimes, and I don't know how to feel about their relationship.
Funny thing is, I have basically become friends with her husband. I am sometimes hanging out with him, we have been going on trips all three of us, and he's even giving me advice on my relationship with his wife.
Now, going back to my relationship...
Like I said, we had the most amazing start to our relationship but after a few months issues started to come up.
She struggle making friends and often ends up having issues with friendships. Big part of this is her looks, because other girls are jealous of her looks and all the guys get interested in her. Anyway, this leads up to her being often lonely and basically only having me and her husband as close people to her.
She was always the stronger one of us, but sometimes she was straight up controlling me with what to buy, who to talk to, what to say and so on. She is very strong willed and can be controlling (which comes from her wanting to control her environment for safety). She is a passionate feminist, a topic which often causes us fights. She talks over me often and I often feel unheard.
Those above issues are real issues, but they are not something that break us apart. Things sometimes get really violent and horrible between us.
So many times she used sex or our relationship as a weapon. "If you don't do X then I am not gonna give you bjs ever again."
Sometimes she would record our arguments and threaten to show them to my friends.
Many times she has been just hauling insults at me even in situations when I have broken down in tears on the floor and she's standing in front of me telling me I'm a worthless peace of sh*t and how easy it is for her to find someone else who will take better care of her and how she can have anyone she wants.
She has gotten into very similar fights with her husband during our relationship as well, which also affects me. It's really hard for me to see her treat him that way and also just seeing her being so emotionally invested in him still. I just can't tell her to move on from him because of how intertwined their past and current lives are. He's always going to be part of her life, as a friend, and that is okay for me. I just wish they weren't so dependent on one another.
I know that any of the above examples are good enough reasons for a breakup. And trust me, we have broken up a lot.
She has broken up with me over small and big issues. Many times I've tried to make the situation right, but ended up packing my stuff and walking away in tears and then she runs after me on the driveway and apologizes and tells me how she will do better and how we can be stronger together.
She has yelled at me, threatened to kill herself with a knife, wished I was dead, verbally assaulted every insecurity I have, walked all over my boundaries, ignored my values... She can be so strong person with her arguments that when she wants something to happen, she won't often give up until she gets what she wants even on the expense of my happiness and my needs. As a joke she once said "your life is just easier if you just give up and do what I say", a sentence I didn't take as a joke.
I also tried breaking up with her many times after huge fights and even when I've been calm. She's always come back for me. It sometimes feels like there simply isn't a way for me to break up with her because we will always end up together no matter what. I have even sometimes felt that I am trapped with her, and once even got a panic attack from simply thinking about breaking up with her and running the thought process in my head how I am not going to be able to break up with her and we will just end up back together.
Any sane reader of course knows that I have my faults as well. It's not just her. I've been horrible to her many times. I've been tearing her down with horrible words, I've been pushing her away from me physically, I've been evil to her.
I don't even really know what to think now. I feel like this relationship has been taking over major parts of my life. I've been so emotionally drained with her that it's affected my friendships, work, sleep and health. I often also feel like I am having hard time respecting myself because of the way things have been and that I haven't been protecting my boundaries and letting her treat me like this. I am also devastated by the horrible actions and words I have said to her.
I am really scared to make a choice to stay. At the same time, thinking of leaving her is the hardest thought for me and I don't want to be apart from her. I do love her.
---
Why am I still with her, you might wonder?
Because it's not all bad. I've had the best (and the worst) times of my life with her. The horrible treatment I described above happened all during maybe 4-6 months period. We are not fighting much anymore.
Through all of this, she has been the most loving person to me (when things have been good). She has said sorry for all and every bad thing she has done, and I have apologized for my horrible words and actions. She's made miles and miles of progress towards being more well-rounded and healthy person. She has been a much better person to me, I can clearly see that. She is much better partner, she hasn't been yelling or cursing or threatening me for many months now, and she's less and less dependant on her husband and they are finding ways to go their own ways.
I often feel that if I had met this version her 2 years ago, there would be no question that I would have already married her and I would want this person to be with me for the rest of my life.
But all the fights, breakups, yelling, cursing, evilness, violence, threats and bad times have really scarred me. I have built so many blocks against her that now it's mostly me who starts the fights because I am falling back to bad habits and mistake her words as an attack towards me. I am still acting towards her in a way as if she would be attacking, manipulating or controlling me.
I have been struggling for months to break through these blocks with not much progress. I love her like crazy, she means everything to me, but lately I am waking up almost daily to the thought that this will never be good again and I will never be able to let go of the bad things. This is really heartbreaking to me, because she is better to me now than she's ever been and she is so loving to me and wants to just be with me, but I don't seem to be able to let go of the past fights and bad things that have been said. She keeps supporting me to grow as a person and I have never learned more about life, love, relationships or the world from another person more than her. On paper, she is almost my dream partner now, a total catch and I am lucky to be with her. Still the past keeps catching up with me, and I feel hopeless that I can ever let the bad stuff go.
Is she the best or the worst thing to happen to me? Is this relationship going to crash and burn or should I break through my blocks, figure out solutions to my doubts, and stay with her "new and better self"?
submitted by jippe1 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 23:08 dinkomaricic [H] Vampyr, Blackwake, Stanley Parable, Plague Inc Evolved, Golf With Your Friends, Iconoclasts, SOMA, The Long Dark, Dirt Rally 2.0, Gang Beasts, ETS2, Tower Unite, Forts, Generation Zero, 60 Seconds, Forager, One Piece Burning Blood & 100's more [W] Wishlist, Paypal(EU)

Read the disclaimer here before we agree on ANY trades

Due to recent issues regarding humblebundle suspending accounts I will provide keys ONLY-no gift links.You can read more in this announcement.

My SGS Rep 85 trades
My IGS Rep 39 trades

I'm from EU,so KEYS SHOULD work pretty much anywhere

NOT BUYING GAMES,ONLY TRADES-games for games or selling for paypal
No interest in ANY RL,CSGO,TF2 or any other keys
BUYER covers the FEES(if outside EU,EU F&F only)

My Wishlist

List of games I have:
10 Second Ninja X
11-11 Memories Retold
60 Seconds! NEW
911 Operator(X2)
Aarklash Legacy
A Case Of Distrust
A Good Snowman Is Hard To Build
A Year Of Rain NEW
Act of Aggression Reboot Edition NEW
Age Of Wonders III NEW
Agent A A Puzzle In Disguise
Agents Of Mayhem(X2) NEW
AI War 2
Alien Spidy
All You Can Eat
Almost There The Platformer
American Fugitive(X2) NEW
Ancestors Legacy NEW
Anomaly Defenders
Anomaly Korea
Anomaly Warzone Earth
Anomaly 2
Archamon
Armello(X2) NEW
Asura Vengeance
Atari Vault
Attack Of The Earthlings
Automachef
Avernum 3 Ruined World
Azkend 2 The World Beneath
Band Of Defenders
Baseball Riot
Basingstoke NEW
Bastion
Batman The Enemy Within NEW
Battalion 1944 NEW
Battlestar Galactic Deadlock Season One NEW
Battle Chasers Nightwar
Beat Hazard 2 NEW
Beholder 2
Bird Of Light
Black Paradox
Blackwake(X2) NEW
Black The Fall
Bohemian Killing
Book Of Demons NEW
Borderlands GOTY Enhanced NEW
Borderlands The Handsome Collection NEW
Boundless NEW
Broforce NEW
Broken Age(X2)
Brothers A Tale Of Two Sons
Brutal Legend(X2)
Call Of Cthulhu NEW
Carnival Games VR
Carrier Command Gaea Mission
Castaway Paradise Town Building Sim
Catherine Classic NEW
Caveblazers
Cities In Motion
Cities In Motion 2(X2) + European Cities
Clouds & Sheep 2
Coffin Dodgers
Company Of Heroes Complete NEW
Concrete Jungle
Crawl(X2) NEW
Crimsonland
Crouching Pony Hidden Dragon
Darkest Dungeon Shieldbreaker DLC
Dark Future Blood Red States
Day Of Infamy
Day Of The Tentacle Remastered NEW
Dead Age
Death Squared
Deadbeat Heroes(X2)
Deep Dungeons Of Doom
Deep Sky Derelicts
Deployment
Desert Child
Dex NEW
Diaries Of A Spaceport Janitor
Dimension Drifter
DiRT 4 NEW
Dirt Rally
Dirt Rally 2.0 + 3 DLC NEW
Distance
Distrust
Downwell
Driftland The Magic Revival
DUCATI 90th Anniversary
Dungeon Rats
Dungeons 2
Dustforce DX
Eador Imperium(X2)
Earthlock NEW
Eastside Hockey Manager NEW
Elite Dangerous NEW
Eliza
Enslaved Odyssey To The West Premium Edition
Equilinox
Escape Goat 2 NEW
E.T. Armies Deluxe Edition
Etherborn
Europa Universalis IV NEW
Euro Truck Simulator 2 NEW
Evergarden
Event[0] NEW
Evoland Legendary Edition NEW
Extinction
F1 2018(X2) NEW
F1 2019 NEW
Fantasy Versus
FarSky
Fear Effect Sedna
Feather
Felix The Reaper NEW
Figment(X2)
Fire Ungh's Quest NEW
Forager NEW
Forts NEW
Fluffy Horde
Framed Collection
Full Throttle Remastered NEW
Fun With Ragdolls The Game NEW
Gang Beasts NEW
Garage Bad Trip
Gas Guzzlers Extreme
Gato Roboto
Gauge
Generation Zero NEW
Genesis Alpha One Deluxe
Get Even
Giana Sisters Twisted Dreams+DLC
GIBZ
GNOG
God's Trigger(X2)
Goetia(X2)
Golf With Your Friends NEW
GoNNER BLüEBERRY EDiTION(X2)
Grand Ages Medieval
Grand Pigeon's Duty
Graveyard Keeper NEW
Gremlins Inc.
Grey Goo Definitive Edition
Grid Autosport NEW
Grid Ultimate Edition(X2) NEW
Grim Fandango Remastered NEW
Grip Combat Racing NEW
Guards Of The Gate
Gunman Tales
Guilty Gear Isuka
Guns Gore & Cannoli
Guns Gore & Canolli 2 NEW
Hacknet(X2) + Labyrinths DLC
Hammerfight
Headlander NEW
Hello Neighbor NEW
Hello Neighbor Hide & Seek NEW
Hero Defense
Hero Of The Kingdom III
Heroes Of The Monkey Tavern
Hive Jump(X2)
Hiveswap Act 1(X2)
Horace NEW
Hotline Miami(X3)
Hotline Miami 2 NEW
Hotline Miami 2 Digital Special Edition NEW
Hot Tin Roof The Cat That Wore A Fedora
Hover
I Am Not A Monster
Iconoclasts NEW
Immortal Planet(X2)
Immortal Redneck
Impact Winter
Infinite Air With Mark McMorris(delisted)
In Between
Interplanetary Enhanced Edition
Jet Set Knights
Juanito Arcade Mayhem
Jump Stars
Kathy Rain NEW
Kill To Collect
Killing Floor 1
Kingdom Classic
King Oddball
Last Tide NEW
Legacy Of Dorn Herald Of Oblivion NEW
Lifeless Planet Premium Edition
Little Big Workshop
Love Is Dead
MagiCat
Magrunner Dark Pulse
Mainlining
Masquerada Songs And Shadows
Masquerade The Baubles Of Doom
Massive Chalice NEW
Medieval Kingdom Wars
Men Of War Assault Squad 2 War Chest Edition NEW
Metal Unit NEW
Minion Masters Premium NEW
Molek Syntez
Monochroma
MotoGP 15
Mr. Shifty
MXGP Official Motocross Videogame
My Friend Pedro NEW
My Memory Of Us
N++ NEW
Nairi Tower Of Shirin
NecroVisioN Lost Company
Neon Chrome
NeuroVoider
Nevermind
Next Hero
Niche(X2)
Night Call NEW
Ninjin Clash Of Carrots
Neoverse NEW
Octahedron
Of Orcs And Men NEW
Old School Musical
Omen Exitio Plague
On Rusty Trails
One Finger Death Punch 2
One Piece Burning Blood NEW
Onikira Demon Killer
Operation Flashpoint Dragon Rising
OPUS The Day We Found Earth
Orbital Racer
Oriental Empires(X2)
Original War(X2)
Outcast Second Contact
Overload NEW
Overlord II
Override Mech City Brawl(X2)
Oxenfree NEW
Pac Man 256
Paper Fire Rookie
Paradigm
Passpartout The Starving Artist NEW
Payday 2 NEW
Penarium
Pikuniku
Pinstripe
Plague Inc Evolved NEW
Poöf
Pound Of Ground(X2)
Primal Carnage Extinction
Psychonauts NEW
Psychonauts In The Rhombus Of Ruin NEW
Puddle
Pumped BMX+
Punch Club
Purrfect Date(X2)
Puss
Quest Of Dungeons
Rad(X2) NEW
Rad Rodgers Radical Edition
Radio Commander NEW
Raiden V Director's Cut
Railway Empire (EU locked) NEW
Rain World NEW
Rebel Galaxy
Redeemer Enhanced Edition NEW
Re-Legion
Remnants Of Naezith NEW
Replay VHS Is Not Dead
Republique NEW
Resident Evil 0 HD Remaster NEW
Resident Evil Revelations 2 Complete NEW
Rise Of Insanity
River City Ransom Underground
Road Redemption(X2)
Rogue Stormers
Rusty Lake Paradise
Sakura Angels
Samorost 3
Satellite Reign
Serious Sam 3 BFE(X2) NEW
Shadow Warrior 2 NEW
Shadows Awakening NEW
Shadwen
She Remembered Caterpillars
Sherlock Holmes The Devil's Daughter NEW
Shock Troopers
Shuyan Saga
SimCity 4 Deluxe Edition
Sky Break
Slipstream(X2)
Smoke And Sacrifice
Snake Pass
Sniper Elite V2
Soma NEW
Songbringer
Sonic CD
Sonic Mania NEW
Sonic The Hedgehog 4 Episode 1 & 2
Space Hulk Ascension
Sparkle 2
Sparkle Unleashed
Spec Ops The Line
Speed Brawl
Spelunky NEW
Stacking NEW
Star Trek(delisted) NEW
Stasis
State Of Mind(X2)
Stealth Bastard Deluxe
Stealth Inc 2 A Game Of Clones(X2)
Steel Rats
Stick Fight The Game(X2) NEW
Strider
Stygian Reign Of The Old Ones NEW
Styx Master Of Shadows NEW
Super Inefficient Golf
Super Panda Adventures
Surviving Mars
Sword Legacy Omen(X2)
Swords And Soldiers 2 Shawarmageddon
Syberia II
Symmetry
Syndrome
Synthetik Legion Rising
Take On Helicopters
Take On Mars
Tales From Candlekeep Tomb Of Annihilation(X2)
Tennis In The Face
Tennis World Tour NEW
Tharsis(X2)
The Adventure Pals
The Bard's Tale IV Director's Cut NEW
The Coma 2 Vicious Sisters
The Darkness II
The Final Station
The Free Ones
The Gate Of Firmament
The Haunted Island
The Invisible Hours
The Journey Down Chapter Three
The King's Bird(X2) NEW
The King Of Fighters XIII Steam Edition
The Last Blade
The Last Leviathan
The Long Dark NEW
The Messenger NEW
The Mims Beginning
The Night Of The Rabbit NEW
The Occupation NEW
The Rivers of Alice Extended Version
The Spatials
The Spiral Scouts
The Stanley Parable NEW
The Stillness Of The Wind NEW
The Testament Of Sherlock Holmes NEW
The Town Of Light(X2)
The Turing Test
The Uncertain The Last Quiet Day
The Walking Dead + 400 Days NEW
The Walking Vegetables
Them's Fightin' Herds(X2)
Think Of The Children
This Is The Police 2
This War Of Mine(X2) NEW
Throne Of Lies Online Game Of Deceit
Through The Darkest Of Times
Tilt Brush NEW
Timeshift
Time Recoil
Titan Quest + Ragnarok NEW
Tooth And Tail
Torchlight(X2)
Torchlight II(X3) NEW
Tower Unite NEW
Toybox Turbos
Tracks The Train Set Game
Train Valley 2 NEW
Treasure Hunter Simulator
Tropico 4
Truberbrook
True Fear Forsaken Souls
Tyranny NEW
Unbox Newbie's Adventure
Unexplored(X2)
Unloved NEW
Vampire The Masquerade Coteries Of New York NEW
Vampyr NEW
Velocibox
Verlet Swing NEW
Vikings Wolves Of Midgard NEW
V Rally 4 NEW
VVVVVV
Warhammer 40K Dawn Of War GOTY NEW
Warhammer 40K Kill Team NEW
Warhammer End Times Vermintide NEW
Wargroove NEW
Warlock Master Of The Arcane
Warsaw NEW
Warstone TD
We Are The Dwarves
We.The Revolution NEW
When Ski Lifts Go Wrong(X2)
White Night
White Noise 2
Wings Of Vi(X2)
Wooden Sen'SeY
World's Dawn
World Of Goo
Worms Revolution
WRC 7 World Rally Championship
Wurm Unlimited
Xenoraid The First Space War
Yet Another Zombie Defense HD
Ylands Exploration Pack
Yooka-Laylee And The Impossible Lair NEW
Yuppie Psycho NEW
Zombie Army Trilogy NEW
Zombie Kill Of The Week Reborn
Zombotron

Programs:
Music Maker EDM Edition+10$ voucher

Some of the games from my wishlist:
Dusk
Ion Fury
Wildfire
Roboquest
Fury Unleashed
Curse Of The Dead Gods
Heist
Children Of Morta
Nightmare Reaper
Amid Evil
...and about 100 more games

I'm from EU,so KEYS SHOULD work pretty much anywhere
This is my Wishlist or offer something(game or paypal)
DONT TRY TO ADD ME ON STEAM OR SEND A PM BEFORE YOU POST IN THIS TOPIC-WILL NOT ANSWER YOU
submitted by dinkomaricic to indiegameswap [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 23:06 dinkomaricic [H] Vampyr, Blackwake, Stanley Parable, Plague Inc Evolved, Golf With Your Friends, Iconoclasts, SOMA, The Long Dark, Dirt Rally 2.0, Gang Beasts, ETS2, Tower Unite, Forts, Generation Zero, 60 Seconds, Forager, One Piece Burning Blood & 100's more [W] Wishlist, Paypal(EU)

Read the disclaimer here before we agree on ANY trades

Due to recent issues regarding humblebundle suspending accounts I will provide keys ONLY-no gift links.You can read more in this announcement.

My SGS Rep 85 trades
My IGS Rep 39 trades

I'm from EU,so KEYS SHOULD work pretty much anywhere

NOT BUYING GAMES,ONLY TRADES-games for games or selling for paypal
No interest in ANY RL,CSGO,TF2 or any other keys
BUYER covers the FEES(if outside EU,EU F&F only)

My Wishlist

List of games I have:
10 Second Ninja X
11-11 Memories Retold
60 Seconds! NEW
911 Operator(X2)
Aarklash Legacy
A Case Of Distrust
A Good Snowman Is Hard To Build
A Year Of Rain NEW
Act of Aggression Reboot Edition NEW
Age Of Wonders III NEW
Agent A A Puzzle In Disguise
Agents Of Mayhem(X2) NEW
AI War 2
Alien Spidy
All You Can Eat
Almost There The Platformer
American Fugitive(X2) NEW
Ancestors Legacy NEW
Anomaly Defenders
Anomaly Korea
Anomaly Warzone Earth
Anomaly 2
Archamon
Armello(X2) NEW
Asura Vengeance
Atari Vault
Attack Of The Earthlings
Automachef
Avernum 3 Ruined World
Azkend 2 The World Beneath
Band Of Defenders
Baseball Riot
Basingstoke NEW
Bastion
Batman The Enemy Within NEW
Battalion 1944 NEW
Battlestar Galactic Deadlock Season One NEW
Battle Chasers Nightwar
Beat Hazard 2 NEW
Beholder 2
Bird Of Light
Black Paradox
Blackwake(X2) NEW
Black The Fall
Bohemian Killing
Book Of Demons NEW
Borderlands GOTY Enhanced NEW
Borderlands The Handsome Collection NEW
Boundless NEW
Broforce NEW
Broken Age(X2)
Brothers A Tale Of Two Sons
Brutal Legend(X2)
Call Of Cthulhu NEW
Carnival Games VR
Carrier Command Gaea Mission
Castaway Paradise Town Building Sim
Catherine Classic NEW
Caveblazers
Cities In Motion
Cities In Motion 2(X2) + European Cities
Clouds & Sheep 2
Coffin Dodgers
Company Of Heroes Complete NEW
Concrete Jungle
Crawl(X2) NEW
Crimsonland
Crouching Pony Hidden Dragon
Darkest Dungeon Shieldbreaker DLC
Dark Future Blood Red States
Day Of Infamy
Day Of The Tentacle Remastered NEW
Dead Age
Death Squared
Deadbeat Heroes(X2)
Deep Dungeons Of Doom
Deep Sky Derelicts
Deployment
Desert Child
Dex NEW
Diaries Of A Spaceport Janitor
Dimension Drifter
DiRT 4 NEW
Dirt Rally
Dirt Rally 2.0 + 3 DLC NEW
Distance
Distrust
Downwell
Driftland The Magic Revival
DUCATI 90th Anniversary
Dungeon Rats
Dungeons 2
Dustforce DX
Eador Imperium(X2)
Earthlock NEW
Eastside Hockey Manager NEW
Elite Dangerous NEW
Eliza
Enslaved Odyssey To The West Premium Edition
Equilinox
Escape Goat 2 NEW
E.T. Armies Deluxe Edition
Etherborn
Europa Universalis IV NEW
Euro Truck Simulator 2 NEW
Evergarden
Event[0] NEW
Evoland Legendary Edition NEW
Extinction
F1 2018(X2) NEW
F1 2019 NEW
Fantasy Versus
FarSky
Fear Effect Sedna
Feather
Felix The Reaper NEW
Figment(X2)
Fire Ungh's Quest NEW
Forager NEW
Forts NEW
Fluffy Horde
Framed Collection
Full Throttle Remastered NEW
Fun With Ragdolls The Game NEW
Gang Beasts NEW
Garage Bad Trip
Gas Guzzlers Extreme
Gato Roboto
Gauge
Generation Zero NEW
Genesis Alpha One Deluxe
Get Even
Giana Sisters Twisted Dreams+DLC
GIBZ
GNOG
God's Trigger(X2)
Goetia(X2)
Golf With Your Friends NEW
GoNNER BLüEBERRY EDiTION(X2)
Grand Ages Medieval
Grand Pigeon's Duty
Graveyard Keeper NEW
Gremlins Inc.
Grey Goo Definitive Edition
Grid Autosport NEW
Grid Ultimate Edition(X2) NEW
Grim Fandango Remastered NEW
Grip Combat Racing NEW
Guards Of The Gate
Gunman Tales
Guilty Gear Isuka
Guns Gore & Cannoli
Guns Gore & Canolli 2 NEW
Hacknet(X2) + Labyrinths DLC
Hammerfight
Headlander NEW
Hello Neighbor NEW
Hello Neighbor Hide & Seek NEW
Hero Defense
Hero Of The Kingdom III
Heroes Of The Monkey Tavern
Hive Jump(X2)
Hiveswap Act 1(X2)
Horace NEW
Hotline Miami(X3)
Hotline Miami 2 NEW
Hotline Miami 2 Digital Special Edition NEW
Hot Tin Roof The Cat That Wore A Fedora
Hover
I Am Not A Monster
Iconoclasts NEW
Immortal Planet(X2)
Immortal Redneck
Impact Winter
Infinite Air With Mark McMorris(delisted)
In Between
Interplanetary Enhanced Edition
Jet Set Knights
Juanito Arcade Mayhem
Jump Stars
Kathy Rain NEW
Kill To Collect
Killing Floor 1
Kingdom Classic
King Oddball
Last Tide NEW
Legacy Of Dorn Herald Of Oblivion NEW
Lifeless Planet Premium Edition
Little Big Workshop
Love Is Dead
MagiCat
Magrunner Dark Pulse
Mainlining
Masquerada Songs And Shadows
Masquerade The Baubles Of Doom
Massive Chalice NEW
Medieval Kingdom Wars
Men Of War Assault Squad 2 War Chest Edition NEW
Metal Unit NEW
Minion Masters Premium NEW
Molek Syntez
Monochroma
MotoGP 15
Mr. Shifty
MXGP Official Motocross Videogame
My Friend Pedro NEW
My Memory Of Us
N++ NEW
Nairi Tower Of Shirin
NecroVisioN Lost Company
Neon Chrome
NeuroVoider
Nevermind
Next Hero
Niche(X2)
Night Call NEW
Ninjin Clash Of Carrots
Neoverse NEW
Octahedron
Of Orcs And Men NEW
Old School Musical
Omen Exitio Plague
On Rusty Trails
One Finger Death Punch 2
One Piece Burning Blood NEW
Onikira Demon Killer
Operation Flashpoint Dragon Rising
OPUS The Day We Found Earth
Orbital Racer
Oriental Empires(X2)
Original War(X2)
Outcast Second Contact
Overload NEW
Overlord II
Override Mech City Brawl(X2)
Oxenfree NEW
Pac Man 256
Paper Fire Rookie
Paradigm
Passpartout The Starving Artist NEW
Payday 2 NEW
Penarium
Pikuniku
Pinstripe
Plague Inc Evolved NEW
Poöf
Pound Of Ground(X2)
Primal Carnage Extinction
Psychonauts NEW
Psychonauts In The Rhombus Of Ruin NEW
Puddle
Pumped BMX+
Punch Club
Purrfect Date(X2)
Puss
Quest Of Dungeons
Rad(X2) NEW
Rad Rodgers Radical Edition
Radio Commander NEW
Raiden V Director's Cut
Railway Empire (EU locked) NEW
Rain World NEW
Rebel Galaxy
Redeemer Enhanced Edition NEW
Re-Legion
Remnants Of Naezith NEW
Replay VHS Is Not Dead
Republique NEW
Resident Evil 0 HD Remaster NEW
Resident Evil Revelations 2 Complete NEW
Rise Of Insanity
River City Ransom Underground
Road Redemption(X2)
Rogue Stormers
Rusty Lake Paradise
Sakura Angels
Samorost 3
Satellite Reign
Serious Sam 3 BFE(X2) NEW
Shadow Warrior 2 NEW
Shadows Awakening NEW
Shadwen
She Remembered Caterpillars
Sherlock Holmes The Devil's Daughter NEW
Shock Troopers
Shuyan Saga
SimCity 4 Deluxe Edition
Sky Break
Slipstream(X2)
Smoke And Sacrifice
Snake Pass
Sniper Elite V2
Soma NEW
Songbringer
Sonic CD
Sonic Mania NEW
Sonic The Hedgehog 4 Episode 1 & 2
Space Hulk Ascension
Sparkle 2
Sparkle Unleashed
Spec Ops The Line
Speed Brawl
Spelunky NEW
Stacking NEW
Star Trek(delisted) NEW
Stasis
State Of Mind(X2)
Stealth Bastard Deluxe
Stealth Inc 2 A Game Of Clones(X2)
Steel Rats
Stick Fight The Game(X2) NEW
Strider
Stygian Reign Of The Old Ones NEW
Styx Master Of Shadows NEW
Super Inefficient Golf
Super Panda Adventures
Surviving Mars
Sword Legacy Omen(X2)
Swords And Soldiers 2 Shawarmageddon
Syberia II
Symmetry
Syndrome
Synthetik Legion Rising
Take On Helicopters
Take On Mars
Tales From Candlekeep Tomb Of Annihilation(X2)
Tennis In The Face
Tennis World Tour NEW
Tharsis(X2)
The Adventure Pals
The Bard's Tale IV Director's Cut NEW
The Coma 2 Vicious Sisters
The Darkness II
The Final Station
The Free Ones
The Gate Of Firmament
The Haunted Island
The Invisible Hours
The Journey Down Chapter Three
The King's Bird(X2) NEW
The King Of Fighters XIII Steam Edition
The Last Blade
The Last Leviathan
The Long Dark NEW
The Messenger NEW
The Mims Beginning
The Night Of The Rabbit NEW
The Occupation NEW
The Rivers of Alice Extended Version
The Spatials
The Spiral Scouts
The Stanley Parable NEW
The Stillness Of The Wind NEW
The Testament Of Sherlock Holmes NEW
The Town Of Light(X2)
The Turing Test
The Uncertain The Last Quiet Day
The Walking Dead + 400 Days NEW
The Walking Vegetables
Them's Fightin' Herds(X2)
Think Of The Children
This Is The Police 2
This War Of Mine(X2) NEW
Throne Of Lies Online Game Of Deceit
Through The Darkest Of Times
Tilt Brush NEW
Timeshift
Time Recoil
Titan Quest + Ragnarok NEW
Tooth And Tail
Torchlight(X2)
Torchlight II(X3) NEW
Tower Unite NEW
Toybox Turbos
Tracks The Train Set Game
Train Valley 2 NEW
Treasure Hunter Simulator
Tropico 4
Truberbrook
True Fear Forsaken Souls
Tyranny NEW
Unbox Newbie's Adventure
Unexplored(X2)
Unloved NEW
Vampire The Masquerade Coteries Of New York NEW
Vampyr NEW
Velocibox
Verlet Swing NEW
Vikings Wolves Of Midgard NEW
V Rally 4 NEW
VVVVVV
Warhammer 40K Dawn Of War GOTY NEW
Warhammer 40K Kill Team NEW
Warhammer End Times Vermintide NEW
Wargroove NEW
Warlock Master Of The Arcane
Warsaw NEW
Warstone TD
We Are The Dwarves
We.The Revolution NEW
When Ski Lifts Go Wrong(X2)
White Night
White Noise 2
Wings Of Vi(X2)
Wooden Sen'SeY
World's Dawn
World Of Goo
Worms Revolution
WRC 7 World Rally Championship
Wurm Unlimited
Xenoraid The First Space War
Yet Another Zombie Defense HD
Ylands Exploration Pack
Yooka-Laylee And The Impossible Lair NEW
Yuppie Psycho NEW
Zombie Army Trilogy NEW
Zombie Kill Of The Week Reborn
Zombotron

Programs:
Music Maker EDM Edition+10$ voucher

Some of the games from my wishlist:
Dusk
Ion Fury
Wildfire
Roboquest
Fury Unleashed
Curse Of The Dead Gods
Heist
Children Of Morta
Nightmare Reaper
Amid Evil
...and about 100 more games

I'm from EU,so KEYS SHOULD work pretty much anywhere
This is my Wishlist or offer something(game or paypal)
DONT TRY TO ADD ME ON STEAM OR SEND A PM BEFORE YOU POST IN THIS TOPIC-WILL NOT ANSWER YOU
submitted by dinkomaricic to SteamGameSwap [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 23:04 Bigfoot_Needs_Wifi 36 [M4F] Nashville - Nerdy guy looking for someone to share a childfree life with.

I live close to Nashville and I’m looking for someone who also wants to live a childfree life. The childfree scene here in Nashville on the online dating apps is pretty nonexistent. I know I don’t want to have children and trying to find someone else near me in the South who also wants the same is like looking for a needle in a haystack in a very small pool. Add to that that I’m an atheist who doesn’t like sweet tea, and that small dating pool shrinks to the depths of a parking lot puddle.
Here’s a bit about me.
I’m 36 years old, 6ft, with brown hair, a short beard and blue eyes. I’m 265lbs with a chubby build but I’m working on getting back in shape.
I live 20-25 minutes north of Nashville. I was a military brat, and I’ve lived all other the world, I’d love to live overseas again. I’ve lived in Tennessee now longer than I’ve lived anywhere else.
I love traveling, exploring around town, visiting new thrift stores, farmers markets and flea markets. I’m a big foodie and I’m always looking to try new restaurants and cuisines. With COVID changing things, I’m mainly just getting take out and trying help the restaurants get through this period. My current favorite cuisines are Indian and Thai.
Some of my hobbies are reading, cooking, bingeing on podcasts and Netflix/Hulu/etc, woodworking and building things. I’m a big nerd and I love all things Marvel and 3D printing, and pre-COVID I liked going to Comic-cons and other conventions.
I’m a huge reader and my favorite genres are mystery, Sci-fi, Fantasy and paranormal. I’m always looking for new books to read.
I’m an atheist, and I’m open to people who are spiritual or religious, but I’m not looking for someone who makes their beliefs the main purpose in their life or someone who doesn’t believe in science.
I’m a liberal Democrat, a Hufflepuff. If you’re interested in personality assessments, I’m a INTJ on the Myers Briggs and a 5 on the enneagram personality test
I have two bachelors degrees and I feel that education is something that never ends and I’m always trying to learn new things and as Neil DeGrasse Tyson put it “know more about the world than I knew yesterday.”
I’ve never smoked weed, but someday I’d like to try it. I’m fine with those who use it and I think it should be legal for everyone nationwide. I’m not a big drinker, I’ll drink socially but it’s not something I do often.
I’m looking for someone to go through life with and explore the world with. Someone who wants to have fun and who likes to joke around and can poke fun at themselves.
So if you’re interested in talking more let me know.
submitted by Bigfoot_Needs_Wifi to cf4cf [link] [comments]


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